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fuck

fuck

you can’t run out the clock dude
that won’t work here
you need to make a move
or get the fuck out of Dodge
but Dodge City is so fucking big anymore!

prettiest girl

prettiest girl

you touched the small of my back
for some reason
you didn’t have to
but would you
touch the small of my back
if you knew?
and who should touch who’s small of the back?
why do people seem to know who they should be with and it makes perfect sense?
or isn’t it like that for them either?
What are they saying?
Why do I care?
Because I think maybe they know something I don’t, and if I could hear them, I’d have the clue I need to know where to turn my energy which is too much and not always nice and a little like it can’t possibly be me and I guess it isn’t but still it is as much me as anything and for now I must pretend to be these rags while they fall through the mascaraed

pretty girl for me

pretty girl for me

prettiest girl I ever saw up close
prettiest girl whose shoulder blade I ever held
prettiest girl I ever turned round
I mean prettiest girl that fits me
the way I am put together the way I am shaped
prettiest girl for me that I ever came across
what does it mean?
Who is my wife?
Prettiest girl for me is not necessarily the same as the right girl for me
The right girl for me is not necessarily the same as a girl who will bend my way
A girl who will bend my way is not necessarily the same as a girl for me
Meanwhile
the world bleeds
the systems fail
surely you
such a great systematizer!
surely you should set aside childish dreams of big tits that shake while you moan
surely you should return to the task
at hand
surely
surely
all your pretty lies
all your sneaky schemes
leave the girls alone
get back to work
or if there is a girl who could be more than a story who could be more than you turning dials and spinning webs
well then
let her show you
what you don’t find no never find on your lonesome

no more

no more

no more
please
captain of the sliding ship
sliding through the atmosphere towards the land where it will break into many pieces puking bodies all over the alien scenery
sliding down the waves deeper and deeper where Davy Jones sleeps and his locker holds all his dreams
a pretty girl
a happy home
a family in a nice safe spot
a world that didn’t walk over him
or flush him down into the pitch black deep dark empty sea so far down so very wrong about what was going to be

who is in the wrong now?
please don’t make me go back
please no more
please I can’t do any more of this
please God
not again
down into the boring stress
down into the pointless struggle
and yet
why should
I
be so special?
Most everyone slogs against the mud
soft and deep cold and calm indifferent to our puny mortal hooks and jabs

useless violence

useless violence

your useless strength
your useless power
your useless violence
because
you are lying
and the lying is always
bodies turned to corpses turned to bones turned to dust turned to sand turned to never mind
sorry

not what you think

not what you think

you
well
you have no idea
you
well
you are wrong
but
it doesn’t matter
the rose petals have fallen
the chill has set in
the snow will fall
the gods don’t care
and the Great God only cares for the One Light
that Eden saw play
you
well
you have no idea
you
well
you are wrong
but
so am I so is this so are we so it comes for us all

untrue

untrue

it is not true
it is a lie
that that would be everything
that that is salvation
that that is all there is
that that is eternal Truth
still
it is true
that you
are lonely
and worn down
by shots fired in the dark
by letters sent to the wall
by dramas staged in the nowhere in the nothing in the nohow

suppressed trauma

suppressed trauma

gets old
wears you down
wins in the end
must you lose
when it wins?
must you break apart
as it hatches?
gets old
you
all alone
no one wants to know
you don’t want them to anyway
but you try it!
you’ll see
it wears you down
it hurts right through
it kills you inside out
but
all along
there’s bigger problems
in wider skies
you must listen to the wider pain
you must hear the wider mistake
and you must reorientate yourself
before it is too late
and the game
becomes as impossible as the fools and villains pretend it is right here and now

Memorial Day

Memorial Day

Who’s the lazy mother fucker who never fought the war?
Who’s the shitless baby pussy face who never dodged the fire
raining across from above and all sides?
Who wandered into his forties over the corpses of young men with their dead eyes open in surprise?
Who never did anything for anyone and watched democracy die a lonely and most of all bored and half-ass death?
Who’s the criminal in the stocking cap torturing children in the early dawn?
What’s a criminal who is never caught but the nice guy next door?
But you’ve mixed up the sins, the little, the medium, and the pretty big huh
Just kids
dead for what?
And now what?