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Author: Bartleby

Rom Love Memo

Rom Love Memo

Dear Love,

I know that you would like to love me.
But you cannot let yourself love me.
Because it would be a bad idea to love me.
Because I am not good husband material.

What if I could change so that I became good husband material?
Then it would be safe for you to love me.
And you could open your heart fully and let me in.
And I could do the same for you.
And we could be happy.

So I will get a better career.
And I will eat only vegetables.
And fast four times a year.
And meditate and exercise daily.
And be a good choice for you.

Then you can turn towards me
As I turn towards you
And we can sink into one another
in love.

A woman can’t let herself love just anybody.
He needs to be able to give her what she needs for her life.
A stable, safe place where she can relax and be herself and they can raise a family.

I don’t want you to go.
What should I do?
What are the systems I can employ?

Sincerely,

Yours

Author: BW
Editor: AW
Copyright: AMW

Cat Soap Ideas

Cat Soap Ideas

January 1, 2022 Cat Tongue Soap Ideas

1.
Momma Cat says:
“If it’s good enough for my kittens, it’s more than good enough for you, person!”

Finally, you can bring all the loving thoroughness of a mother cat’s love to your personal hygiene!

Whether you enjoy washing, or fear it as much as a kitten, our gentle, delicately fragrant, lather-rich soap in the shape and with the intent of a cat, tongue out and licking, will clean your body and refresh your spirit.

“How magic-like do I now float through all recollections of cats licking kittens, their human friends, themselves, the furniture, and everything else. I am by this perfect balance of whimsy, silliness, function and luxury (I’d forgotten that bathing is a luxury, but now I remember!) transported far beyond the bounds of life and death, into the mists of Beauty=Truth=Goodness=Justice.

“Yes, we live all within an interconnected daydream giggling forth with infinite vigor, yet perfect restraint. How can a novelty soap unravel all the mysteries within my watching mind and seeking heart? I must’ve been ripe. The storm clouds must’ve been nigh on bursting. And this bar of soap, imagining itself a cat come to lick away my grime and dissolve itself for to ferry my missteps down the drain and away, is a mighty spark. A dry soul is indeed wisest and best; but Soul is but damp kindling until lit!

“Ah Cat Soap Merry, ah whirling delight of love-suspended thought!”,

You’ll think to yourself, while using this carefully-selected soap pulp in this hand-designed soap form.

2.
The cat’s had your tongue long enough!
It’s time for you take the cat’s tongue!

Our soap, daydreamily hand-designed with world-class whimsy, is not simply a disarmingly cartoonish cat head with it’s tongue out. No! Into this soap we’ve woven the very essence of a mother cat’s persistent, scolding, but — we take this not on faith, but on fully-present, whole-being observations — fundamentally affectionate kitten-grooming.

Can you believe it? Can you believe that we’ve distilled the essence of a mother cat’s love for her kittens, and bottled it into a soap? All via the mere creation of a form fit to hold it? Well, believe it! Because that’s exactly what we maintain — or else we’re purveying naught but marketing poppycock and advertising flim-flammery!

And so what if we are?

Still the soap is quality, the form is entertaining, and the silliness redeeming.

Yes! We hereby proclaim — and where’s the mountaintop high enough for this valley-flooding news? — that we’re just goofing around.

We won’t name names, but have you never before read the packaging of our competition — and, by nature competitive, we here encompass all for-profit enterprises throughout all of human history — and detected a whiff of duplicity? It’s as if they weren’t coming clean.

Let us come clean! We want your money, but more than that, we want your love, we want safe passage, why want dignity, we want to be out of the rain and into the sun. We want to succeed in this life for real: To support ourselves while contributing to a larger community where everyone is protected from the ravishes of the elements and violences human and animal, and all are free to think and feel for themselves while, through the grace of open and competent government checked and guided by a free people, together coaxing their shared world towards the gentler, the kinder, the wiser, the more joyfully-sharing.

So there you have it. We want it all. And here’s a product we made.

It is a bar of soap in the shape of a cartoon cat licking something or someone. Please consider it for the cat-lover on your list.

But it is also a daydream-chord-striker, a muse-spark, a mirthsome thought-object inspiring a more hilariously meditative bathtimes. Please consider it for the lonely, unnamed longing.

3.
Sick of showering?
Feel like bathing’s just a waste of time masquerading as social convention and marketing gimmicks?
What you need is a hygiene that means something!
What you need is efficiency: A soap that cleans your soul with your body!
What you need is a high-quality, but straightforwardly plain and unobtrusive beauty soap in the shape of a cartoon cat head with it’s tongue out to lick you clean as if you were a kitten.
What you need is a soap that transcends bathing.
What you need is a soap that invites you to consider the mother cat, and how within the persistent, oppressive, scolding licks there is not just a mother’s animal affection for her young, but something much grander.
What you need is a bathtime meditation upon the Love that shines through and binds all sentience.
What you need is Cat Soap Merry.
Cat-Clean, the soap for kittens of all ages, species, and dispositions.

4.
Say Goodbye to solitary bathing!
And Hello to Cat-Clean!
The first soap to bring you all the rough-tongued love of a mother cat!
Try our creamy, soothing artisanal soap in the whimsical shape and with the fiery energy of a cartoon cat, tongue out to lick away all dirt, grime, cares, and senses of propriety and modesty!
Experience the cuddly thrill of a mother cat’s love!
Say goodbye to bathing alone and hello to bathing in the pushy love of Momma Cat!

Cat-Clean: Raising the bar on soap!
Cat-Clean: Two soaps in one:
A simply elegant beauty bar for your skin,
&, for your soul:
A charming cartoon cat, licking away your cares, and reminding you that we’re all just lost, rain-soaked, momma-cat-bereft kittens seeking the Larger Light!

Cat-Clean: Because it’s lonely washing yourself.
Cat-Clean: Reclaim what’s been lost:
Let Momma Cat coerce cleanliness into you once again!
And return thus to Nature — to being home within matter by drifting beyond it, into heart, into charm, into whimsy and delight.

For Volcano Cat Soap

1.
You bathe, but do you live?
You know soap, but do you know Joy?
Introducing:
Cat-Tongue Soap!
All the sandpapery goodness of a mother cat’s love!
Enjoy a high-quality pumice-filled volcanic beauty bar in the form of a cat’s head.
But not just any cat’s head.
A whimsical, cartoon cat, tongue out, ready to lick you clean — whether you like it or not!
By pairing the scratchiness of pumice with the daydreamed invocation of a cat’s tongue-bathing, our soap turns bathing into a nostalgic meditation upon the ways of cats, humans, and the wider worlds.
Try it today!
A CATalyst for tender recollections and profound reflections, or your money back!
[Get it? CATalyst. Because we’re making a list of positive attributes of this product: a lyst. Get it?]
[Hey! Get away from that ad copy! That is not the joke! Who let that guy in the ad room?! That is not the joke!]

2.
Riddle: When is a soap more than a soap?
Answer: When it is an experience!
Cat-Clean, now in cat-tongue texture!
All the cartoonish charm you’ve come to depend upon from Cat-Clean, but with a grainy soap, so as to rub you coarse, with the rough, sandpaper affection of a mother cat’s tongue.
Now and Brand New! Sink into the complete experience of bath time with Mother Cat!
Feel the relentless, nit-picking tenderness of Momma Cat — how there’s nowhere to run, nowhere to hide as she licks your matted fur until you’re tidy and presentable.
Introducing Cat-Clean, the Cat-Tongue Experience:
Who says “Clean and Wholesome” has to mean “Pleasant and Comfortable”??

Bonus: Cat Soap Merry Ad From July 25, 2013

WAP’s Cat Soap!
The doodle on our soap is over 75% cat and nearly 110% whimsy!
Our soap is formed of fatty and unctuous ingredients!
At Wandering Albatross Press, we manufacture wholesome fun and only wholesome fun! The rest we purchase from other companies to use as bases around which we drape and shape wholesome fun! This is similar to how a sculpture often has a wire base!
The beauty and the grandeur were here before we made our products and will be here after we stop making them!
Our soap — like all soaps — is water soluble! So enjoy this biodegradable product with the same satisfaction, relief, and pride as you’d feel drinking your coffee-shop coffee from a cup made of pressed rice! (I think they make such things; I think I saw it on TV; !)
Don’t worry about the gods! They are too blessed and immortal to bother themselves with you and your escapes into the cuddling “awww!” of drawings that invoke kitty cats! (That’s a joke that we learned from Epicurus. Yes!, we knew him well. No!, we don’t think he knew he was being funny; but, actually, maybe.)
Considered as the average of our aggregate, we at WAP honestly like cats pretty well, so you cat-lovers can kind of think of us as “{sort of} one of your own”!
We get the bulk of the cat-essences used for our cat-doodles by watching 100% real cats!
If we had a budget, almost all of our profits would go towards buying us time to create more wholesome fun!
We at Wandering Albatross Press do not tolerate drunkenness on the job — ever!
(My guess is that) This soap is a poor insulator, but a good conductor! (I might be wrong.)
The tenderness you feel for drawings that invoke kitty cats is not true kindness, but it might be a little bit in the right direction! (Assuming you don’t assume that collecting whimsical sketches of innocently unaware (and therefore cute) furballs is any kind of a stopping- or even resting-point for your love.)

A Useful Something Deeperism

A Useful Something Deeperism

Something Deeperism has changed no one’s life for the better. We therefore judge it useless.

We shall examine the one or two extant practicing Something Deeperist(s) to better understand how the philosophy in practice fails its practitioner.

First, a reminder of the philosophy of Something Deeperism:

Something Deeperism for Individuals

Something Deeperism for individuals purports to be based on a combination of psychological realism and metaphysical plausibility: the human psyche is like so; and this necessitates such and such intellectual, emotional, moral, and spiritual maneuver; but that’s OK because it is plausible that that maneuver is intellectually, emotionally, morally and spiritually doable; and if it is indeed thus doable, the practitioner will gain more and more insight into that and in what way it is indeed doable as the practitioner advances in their practice.

Something Deeperism for groups is similar, except it focuses more on the fact that no one’s thought makes sense to oneself except to the degree they are successful Something Deeperists; which implies that all our group enterprises (including governing) cannot under any circumstances be allowed to violate the principles of Something Deeperism (because to the extent that they do violate these principles, they are no longer meaningful to anyone within the group).

Specifically,

Something Deeperism for individuals assumes:

(1) Human beings cannot understand, care about, or believe in their own feeling/thinking/acting except to the degree that they feel/think/act aware, clear, honest, accurate, competent, open-hearted/-minded, loving, kind, win-win/best-for-everyone, and joyfully free of selfish concerns. We cannot coherently think/feel/act except insofar as we follow these inborn-rules of our own thinking/feeling/acting.

(2) But to feel/think/act in this way implies insight into what is really going on, what really matters, and how to best fit oneself into what is really going on and what really matters. And also that what is really going on is Truly Good, ie: that insight into “what is really going on” ratifies and explicates our inner sense towards those ways of thinking/feeling/acting without which we cannot understand, care about, or believe in our own thinking/feeling/acting.

If there is no such thing as “what is truly going on” or if we can have no meaningful insight into this Reality, then we have no hope for being very meaningful to ourselves: we cannot help but assume and seek to live in accord with “what is truly going on”. Obviously, people often espouse philosophies that claim otherwise, but they are kidding themselves, hiding in dogmatic and/or aesthetic notions that, for whatever reasons, make them FEEL like they have some kind of meaningful hold on TRUE and GOOD.0

If kindness is not superior to cruelty to a person with insight into “what is truly going on”, then a person with insight into “what is truly going on” would have no way to meaningfully interact with this Reality. Wisdom would lead not to more coherence, but to a fundamental and irrevocable incoherence of feeling/thought/action.

(3) Our only hope is therefore, that Reality exists, that it is something along the lines of a True Good, and that we can have meaningful insight into Reality.

(3a) People say, “what does True Good even mean?” This is just dust in the eyes tactics. What concept does anyone truly understand? Words point towards notions, and never perfectly. Words like “God” and “Buddha Nature” and “Pure Love” and “True Good” point towards shared vistas just as well as words like “door” and “pigeon”. You can argue that “True Good” is just notions like “accurate” and “worthwhile” turned up and up and ever up by some crazed inner longing for perfection. OK, that’s a theory; but the point remains we have the gist of the direction where spiritual notions point. That does not prove they are actually pointing to something infinite, eternal, or important. We’ve not reached that far in our argument. And, in a sense, we never do.

(4) It is not particularly implausible that the mystics are right, and that lying beneath and animating this life is something like Pure Love. An energy of infinitely expanding all-embracing and -uplifting joy. Why not? Once you get down to what’s really going on in the universe, one factual account is as likely as any other. Science can explain to us what math plus empirical observation equal, and that is the extent and culmination of certain aspects of our thought. In a sense, science is true. But it is no more absolutely true than anything else because it can no more prove what it assumes (that our logic and empirical observations have a meaningful relationship to Reality, or that Reality does or doesn’t exist, or what Reality even is) than any other set of axioms and the conclusions drawn therefrom.

(5) Why not follow a spiritual path? Why not purposely seek a Love that is real and wise and that guide one’s feeling/thinking/acting towards more and more insight into what is really going on, what really matters, and how to best fit oneself into what is going on so as to bring about what is best for all? Why not seek wisdom and thereby give yourself a chance at feeling/thinking/acting more and more aware, clear, honest, accurate, competent, open-hearted/-minded, kind, win-win/best-for-all, and joyfully selfless?

(6) But how? Human feeling/thinking/acting cannot make much sense of literal accounts of Reality.

(6a) We can understand literal accounts of things like science, math, and other clearly defined rules and facts. But a science cannot be clearly defined if it tries to prove or even explain it’s own assumptions. It is precisely because the natural sciences ignore all questions about whether or not their facts actually exist or matter that they’re able to be so literally clear and precise.

(6b) Some religions claim literal knowledge of things like whether or not God exists, and what God is like, and sometimes even what God has done on earth. But even if such knowledge existed, human minds could make no literal sense of it. In the end, even supposing some set of dogmas is literally True, people could not understand them in a literal scientific way for reasons outlined in 6a, and so how could they understand them? They could only understand these literal Truths to the degree they had whole-being insight, ie: an insight that relied not just on literal thought, but on emotional clarity and spiritual insight as well. That is to say, even supposing some religion or religions possess dogmas that are literally True, that Truth is only accessible to people to the degree they are wise, ie: to the degree they are able to transcend the merely literal accounts and enter into a whole-being relationship with the deeper essence of the dogmas. But, really, no religion can possess the literal Truth anyway, since the Truth, if it is to be that great and useful object that we wish It to be, cannot fit into mere ideas, let alone mere dogmas.

(6c) That is not to say that religions have no relationship to the Truth, merely that the relationship any human or human communication or human enterprise has to the Truth is poetic. With a “poetic relationship” we mean that one relates to something meaningfully, and perhaps even with one’s whole being (ideas, feelings, soullight, etc as the case may be), but not in a literal, 1:1, definitive way that lends itself to clear, symbol-based communication like with math.

(6c1) Note that math also becomes poetry to the degree it’s thinker dreams about the math’s relationship to Reality. It is here that math is experienced as art or something more. What it is, we do not hazard a guess; as we’ve not yet hazarded a guess about what the poetry within religious thought is.

(6d) So we’ll have not literal insight into the True Good. But as we noted in 1-3, we require some kind of an insight into the True Good to understand, believe in, and care about our own thinking/acting/feeling. So we can’t give up.

(6e) What about the poetic relationship that religions have with the True Good? What about a path of prayer, meditation, and meeting with others who share a common poetic language for talking about how to act in this world in such a way as to live in accordance with what is really going on and what truly matters? Why not? Why not try for wisdom in this way? Or, if that’s not your style, why not go off alone and pray and meditate and see to do no harm but to be only gentle and kind while praying always for more and more insight into what loving kindness really is? If Reality is True and Good and we can organize our feeling/thinking/acting better and better around Reality, then Reality can help us to think and feel and act more aware, clear, honest, accurate, competent, etc. And through this ever-improving organization around Reality, we would gain more and more insight into that and in what way Reality was Real, and It was True and Good — we would gain more and more insight into the sense in which it is True to say “We are all this together”. And that would be helpful. We would grow in internal coherence — we would become more and more meaningful to ourselves. There can be no literal proof of Something Deeperism, but with arguments like 1-6e, we can demonstrate that Something Deeperism is worth a try, and that, if it works, it will give one a kind of internal proof: one’s entire conscious space will, by organizing itself better and better around the Truth shining in and through all things, will gain more and more whole-being insight into that and in what way it is True to say “There is a Truth, shining in and through all things — words cannot point to it literally, but they can be part of poetic individual orientations within It and poetic communication of Its Nature.”

(7) But how to know we’re not fooling ourselves? Afterall, isn’t that what people do? Whether their line be “God is Good!” or “There’s no Truth!”, don’t they always do the sam shit? Don’t they always just find ways to feel good and strong and worthy while also sliding trinkets into their pockets and getting accolades from their friends for their generous gifts while they let the rest of the world go down the tubes. Isn’t that what people do, regardless of their stated worldview?

It is at this point that our practitioner’s individual Something Deeperism breaks down.

We observe him wandering around, asking God about some girl, or how he can stop being broke, or what to do about the Republican attack on US American democracy, or what diet will make him the best long-term husband for that girl, or how to stop “the Evil” and what is “the Evil” really? and on and on.

Of course, he receives no reply, but only notions that he then either accepts or argues with.

This is, then, his “wisdom practice”.

He throws in some meditative breathing.

And so on.

It’s ridiculous!

But what is a reliable wisdom practice?

How is this really supposed to work?

Who has this working?

We can put forth guidelines, like: we need enough dogmatism to keep orientating ourselves better and better around the True Good; but not so much dogmatism that we confuse our ideas and feelings about the True Good for the True Good Itself. But how does one put such precepts into practice? I guess the best approach is a humble spiritual path: neither fussing too much about eschewing all dogmas nor about getting dogma exactly right, but instead finding a religion where one feels comfortable and then working alone and with others to grow more and more insight into that and in what way we are all in this together, and what that interconnectedness around the One Light should mean for one’s own life.

The world is full of more or less successful Something Deeperists. Indeed, we all know at some level that it goes too far to say we Know what’s going on, but it also goes too far to say we Don’t Know what’s going on. We all know at some level that our ideas about what’s going on are not the same as what’s going on, but that, in time, by following our inborn impulses towards awareness, honesty, clarity, accuracy, competency, kindness, compassion, win-win and shared joy, we can grow in wisdom — in the whole-being sense about what is really going on, what really matters, and how we should really behave. We all have some sense of the way that our feeling/thinking/acting relates poetically, but not therefore inadequately towards love.

So maybe Bartleby Willard can’t move from essay into a living assay. And maybe Amble Whistletown can’t take spirituality seriously enough to stop bickering with daydreamed gods. But still their ideas about Something Deeperism are basically correct. That many people with no interest in the philosophy of Something Deeperism are better Something Deeperists than they are proves nothing. The philosophy of Something Deeperism is just to help motivate and organize the work of Something Deeperism, but the work itself is the same as its always been: believe in the Light within, but not blindly: keep pushing for more and more whole-being insight into the Light within that tells us we are all in this together.

Collective Something Deeperism & Liberal Democracy

Let us turn now to Something Deeperism in groups. Do we have any living models of Something Deeperism in groups? On the one hand, if we have only one or two living Something Deeperist, we by definition can have no example of Something Deeperism in groups. On the other hand, many of the core principles within liberal democracies are core principles of Something Deeperism. And this is where things begin to get painful and scary. Because we may soon lose democracy in the United States, and this will be a cruel blow to Something Deeperism qua group philosophy, and to humanity as a whole. Let’s not mince words!

First: What do we mean by “we could lose democracy”?

We mean that our shared ability to improve our shared democracy could deteriorate to the point that we can no longer improve democracy, and we will fall deeper and deeper into tyranny — where rulers keep power primarily through fear and violence, rather than primarily by trying to govern openly and competently in ways that win them the support of the public at the ballot box. We mean we could end up in regime where the we are not free to speak our minds at the ballot box (because our will there is completely ignored) or in the public sphere (because of fear for the welfare and safety of ourselves and those we love).

Second: What is the proper place of Something Deeperism in public life, and how does it relate to liberal democracy?

Separation of Church and State. The freedom to speak one’s mind without fear of retribution from one’s government. The right to assemble and discuss one’s ideas with others. The right to a fair trial, unprejudiced by political considerations.

What do these kinds of rights grant one?

They grant one the space to think for oneself and share one’s ideas without fearing retaliation from one’s government, or from one’s fellows.

A government led by elected representatives of the people who must repeatedly stand for free and fair elections if they are to maintain power, with a professional rather than political bureaucracy. A transparent and open government, with the votes and other political actions of the elected officials (except in the rare case of information that could threaten national security) part of the public record. Laws against corruption: against the use of political power to enrich oneself, ones families, ones friends and one allies; against the political tests for bureaucratic functions such as enforcing legislated regulations; against selling political favors; against interfering in election results or in the election process. Division of powers and checks and balances arranged to keep any one person, branch, or group from seizing undue influence over the government — including but not limited to, using their existing political power to maintain their political power.

What do these kinds of rules grant the citizenry of a nation?

They — along with rights protecting free speech, freedom of knowledge, and open discourse — grant the people the ability to meaningfully share the government. The most fundamental duty of the citizenry of a representative democracy is to serve as a final check on madness and corruption in government. So long as they remain diligent and successful here, they can maintain a meaningful relationship to their shared government, and are free to help shape the political landscape and conversations that decide the matters of the day.

What is Something Deeperism?

It is the decision to plainly state and methodologically draw conclusions from that which we all know to be fundamentally true of our own feeling/thinking/acting: we cannot make sense to ourselves except to the extent we are guided by reliable insight into the Truth, but we cannot understand the Truth in a literal way, and so we must seek to better and better organize all our feeling/thinking/acting around the Truth that we sense shining in and through all things.

Long Aside Clarifying Something Deeperism (in general, not particularly in groups — you don’t have to read this part, though it belongs to the nature of your authors that they must write it

This final maneuver is perhaps a bit too mystic for some, they would rather express their inborn Something Deeperism with something like “a Truth that we would hope is already within us and meaningfully related to our ideas and feelings, for if it isn’t, then we will never be able to relate meaningfully to It”. This is indeed probably the better formulation to begin with.

And a better formulation for a mature Something Deeperism would probably be something like what we just gave the neophyte to say, plus something like ” — a Truth that, meditation, prayer, community, and selfless self-giving; all centered around the never-ending quest to better and better follow our inborn sense of towards choosing truer accounts and preferable feelings, thoughts, and actions; all of which has to be and is in fact nourished, explicated, and guided by an inner Light that relates meaningful albeit not literally (and what good would that do us, anyway?, since literal thought is a tool for organizing concrete-seeming objects — not anything a whole human mind can inhabit and understand!) to the other contents of a human’s conscious space.”

But that’s all rather wordy. So, for shorthand we say that Something Deeperism is the recognition that for human thought to be meaningful to itself, one must have insight into the True Good, but that insight cannot (due to the nature of both human thought and any possible Truth) be literal, but must instead by an internally-meaningful organization of one’s conscious space around an indwelling Truth — an organization that would then allow one’s ideas to relate meaningfully enough to the True Good for one to speak poetically yet still meaningfully about the True Good.

But that’s still wordy. And it leaves out any poetry about the True Good that might make our sense of It clearer. So, let’s just say that Something Deeperism is the recognition that we humans know that we should think, feel, and act clearly and honestly, loving one another and the Light within and through us all, and in this way finding and doing what is best for everyone, and living in shared joy — the recognition that we know this sense of things more fundamentally than we know any certainty that would explain it or any doubt that would dispute it.

Returning to how Something Deeperism relates to liberal democracy

Something Deeperism is the recognition that we humans know that we should think, feel, and act clearly and honestly, loving one another and the Light within and through us all, and in this way finding and doing what is best for everyone, and living in shared joy: It is the recognition that we know this sense of things more fundamentally than we know any certainty that would explain it or any doubt that would dispute it.

Something Deeperism in groups is not obsessed with getting every member of the group to agree with the ideas of Something Deeperism. Indeed, what could be more antithetical to Something Deeperism? All that Something Deeperism asks of groups is that they all together agree on what they already agree on: No worldview is meaningful to a human if that worldview contradicts those values without which no human is meaningful to himsherself. Therefore, let us agree to create and maintain rules and standards that encourage and support clarity, honesty, accuracy, competence, compassion/loving-kindness, win-win, and shared responsibility and joy. We’re not random motions, nor adding machines, nor robots, nor even blind animal impulses chained to sophisticated internal and external sensations and machines for generating logical-/causal-chains. We are human beings. And we cannot understand, believe in, or care about the contents of our own feeling/thinking/acting except to the degree we abide by our own internal laws for thinking/feeling/acting: We must think/feel/act in full awareness of our internal and external surroundings — which for humans means we must work to always become more clear, honest, accurate, competent and effective, but also more compassionate, gentle, loving, and effective at making everyone’s world better and life brighter.

That is the path by which a human can become more and more meaningful to oneself. And to the degree we stray from that path, we become less and less meaningful to ourselves. So we defeat our collective and individual selves to the degree we do not agree upon and maintain the supremacy of these fundamental values within our governments and communities. It is not virtuous to destroy those structures that make it easier and more rewarding for you and others to live virtuously. That kind of behavior is idiotic to the degree you don’t know what you are destroying and evil to the degree you do know what you are destroying. What virtue is more fundamental that protecting the structures that foster and encourage virtuous feeling/thinking/acting? And so we betray our individual and collective selves to the degree that we harm those organizations that fight madness and corruption in government.

Madness in government is losing the inability to coherently choose one thing over another. Corruption in government is rewarding non-virtuous behavior and punishing virtuous behavior. The two are interrelated, linked by chaos: the more insane a government, the more chaotic, and the more randomly corrupt; but when a government is purposefully corrupt it also becomes more chaotic and insane. Government corruption is evil in the same way that training oneself to get by by lying, cheating, and harming other people is evil.

Humans are individuals, but they are also all interrelated. And their individual selves flow into their exterior surroundings, so that strands of feeling/thinking/acting flow between them, turning aspects of their individual consciousnesses into the fibers of collective notions and behaviors.

To fight corruption in the individual, an individual must also work to fight it in the collective.

That last sentence is likely to receive approbation from people who would sacrifice free speech and democratic government for laws that outlaw certain types of behavior that they find unpalatable, demand univseral fealty to certain religious or political doctrines, or otherwise hurt everyone’s ability to find their own way to the Truth. To these people, we can only say: You misunderstand us. We’re talking about fighting for a free and open government that respects free thought and speech and does not interfere with an individuals spiritual development (what, after all, is the use of forcing people to pretend [to themselves and/or others] that they believe x, y or z?).

Corruption is most fundamentally the encouragement of a climate where the fundamental virtues are made more difficult, dangerous, and thus rare. It is this squelching of the human spirit that we are suggesting we all band against.

It is evil to seek to weaken democratic laws and norms. Those laws and norms are there so that we can maintain enough control over our government to at least serve as a final check on madness and corruption in government.

By following the dictator’s book of denying a fair election outcome and seeking to make laws that make it more difficult for their opponents to vote and/or easier for local officials to overturn the people’s votes, the US Republican party is pursuing a course that is idiotic to the degree it’s individual and collective actors (collectives are many and overlapping organizations of people) don’t know what they are doing, and evil to the degree that it’s individual and collective actors do know what they are doing.

What do we do? I’m asking you, USA: What do we do?

It doesn’t help much to tell people they are to some degree foolish and the remaining percent evil. But it also doesn’t help to pretend that behavior that threatens to destroy our ability to share government and to together prevent it from oppressing and it’s citizens and lashing out at the rest of the world is just another partisan difference. It is very dangerous to play around with tyranny when your nation has the largest economy and nuclear arsenal in the world — especially when the world faces the potentially destabilizing consequences of climate change and other environmental disasters. To the degree tyranny rules, the nation is governed incompetently. Tyranny is not fundamentally interested in governing well for everyone, but doing whatever it takes to maintain power in the few that for whatever stupid — generally dishonest and cruel — reasons at a given moment have power.

The Republicans chanting “stop the steal!” while supporting, or at least not speaking out against their local representatives’ efforts to reduce or in some cases even overturn opposing votes in the future elections — the Republicans supporting all this anti-democratic behavior not foolish, nor evil, but merely misinformed? But is there not some responsibility for checking one’s sources of information? Is that not part of competent thought? And isn’t incompetent political thought usually to some degree willfully sought: do we humans not seek out internal confusions so as to better cheer along what gives and keeps us in splendor, or at least in good with the side we need to be on in order to feel like we belong?

Ah, but how hard it is to free oneself from one’s fellows! Who among us can stand very far apart from the ideas and sentiments of our closest associates? Or at least from the tribe we’ve adopted — even if we mostly only engage in the tribe passively, by nodding along while someone on TV explains to us the details of how we’ve figured everything out?

And who can navigate the information age? Is it not in many ways a terrible explosion of lonely cacophonies?

And yet, in the end, democracy will fall if Republicans don’t decide to stick up for it even at the cost of a moment of political power. They need to take responsibility for this moment. For the sake of the rest of us, but also for their own sakes. Because a corrupt government is one that discourages truth and goodness and encourages dishonesty, thuggery, cruelty, and the like.

And then, I don’t think I need remind you, and yet I guess I’ll mention this truism: A tyranny may outlaw abortion today and prescribe it tomorrow.

I am at a loss.

What do we do? How can Something Deeperism help?

What good is Something Deeperism?

Everyone gives lip service to the basic values of Something Deeperism. And often people say they are being honest and kind and helpful and doing what is best for everyone, when they are in fact doing pretty much exactly the opposite.

Individual Something Deeperists can hide in empty platitudes about Truth and Goodness, while avoiding the discipline that comes with a more organized spiritual path.

Groups and political leaders can use empty platitudes about fighting for honesty and against corruption as tools to help them deceive people and undermine a government’s anti-corruption measures.

What good is Something Deeperism?

How does it come into its own?

How does it ever actually help?

Please.

How?

Author: Bartleby Willard
Editor: Amble Whistletown
Copyright: Andrew M. Watson

Frankenstein – Ch. 23

Frankenstein – Ch. 23

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

It was eight o’clock when we landed; we walked for a short time on the shore, enjoying the transitory light, and then retired to the inn and contemplated the lovely scene of waters, woods, and mountains, obscured in darkness, yet still displaying their black outlines.

The wind, which had fallen in the south, now rose with great violence in the west. The moon had reached her summit in the heavens and was beginning to descend; the clouds swept across it swifter than the flight of the vulture and dimmed her rays, while the lake reflected the scene of the busy heavens, rendered still busier by the restless waves that were beginning to rise. Suddenly a heavy storm of rain descended.

I had been calm during the day, but so soon as night obscured the shapes of objects, a thousand fears arose in my mind. I was anxious and watchful, while my right hand grasped a pistol which was hidden in my bosom; every sound terrified me, but I resolved that I would sell my life dearly and not shrink from the conflict until my own life or that of my adversary was extinguished.

Elizabeth observed my agitation for some time in timid and fearful silence, but there was something in my glance which communicated terror to her, and trembling, she asked, “What is it that agitates you, my dear Victor? What is it you fear?”

“Oh! Peace, peace, my love,” replied I; “this night, and all will be safe; but this night is dreadful, very dreadful.”

I passed an hour in this state of mind, when suddenly I reflected how fearful the combat which I momentarily expected would be to my wife, and I earnestly entreated her to retire, resolving not to join her until I had obtained some knowledge as to the situation of my enemy.

She left me, and I continued some time walking up and down the passages of the house and inspecting every corner that might afford a retreat to my adversary. But I discovered no trace of him and was beginning to conjecture that some fortunate chance had intervened to prevent the execution of his menaces when suddenly I heard a shrill and dreadful scream. It came from the room into which Elizabeth had retired. As I heard it, the whole truth rushed into my mind, my arms dropped, the motion of every muscle and fibre was suspended; I could feel the blood trickling in my veins and tingling in the extremities of my limbs. This state lasted but for an instant; the scream was repeated, and I rushed into the room.

[Our Intervention Elizabeth Lives begins here.]

[Continue reading after you’ve finished “Elizabeth Lives”:]

Great God! Why did I not then expire! Why am I here to relate the destruction of the best hope and the purest creature on earth? She was there, lifeless and inanimate, thrown across the bed, her head hanging down and her pale and distorted features half covered by her hair. Everywhere I turn I see the same figure—her bloodless arms and relaxed form flung by the murderer on its bridal bier. Could I behold this and live? Alas! Life is obstinate and clings closest where it is most hated. For a moment only did I lose recollection; I fell senseless on the ground.

When I recovered I found myself surrounded by the people of the inn; their countenances expressed a breathless terror, but the horror of others appeared only as a mockery, a shadow of the feelings that oppressed me. I escaped from them to the room where lay the body of Elizabeth, my love, my wife, so lately living, so dear, so worthy. She had been moved from the posture in which I had first beheld her, and now, as she lay, her head upon her arm and a handkerchief thrown across her face and neck, I might have supposed her asleep. I rushed towards her and embraced her with ardour, but the deadly languor and coldness of the limbs told me that what I now held in my arms had ceased to be the Elizabeth whom I had loved and cherished. The murderous mark of the fiend’s grasp was on her neck, and the breath had ceased to issue from her lips.

While I still hung over her in the agony of despair, I happened to look up. The windows of the room had before been darkened, and I felt a kind of panic on seeing the pale yellow light of the moon illuminate the chamber. The shutters had been thrown back, and with a sensation of horror not to be described, I saw at the open window a figure the most hideous and abhorred. A grin was on the face of the monster; he seemed to jeer, as with his fiendish finger he pointed towards the corpse of my wife. I rushed towards the window, and drawing a pistol from my bosom, fired; but he eluded me, leaped from his station, and running with the swiftness of lightning, plunged into the lake.

The report of the pistol brought a crowd into the room. I pointed to the spot where he had disappeared, and we followed the track with boats; nets were cast, but in vain. After passing several hours, we returned hopeless, most of my companions believing it to have been a form conjured up by my fancy. After having landed, they proceeded to search the country, parties going in different directions among the woods and vines.

I attempted to accompany them and proceeded a short distance from the house, but my head whirled round, my steps were like those of a drunken man, I fell at last in a state of utter exhaustion; a film covered my eyes, and my skin was parched with the heat of fever. In this state I was carried back and placed on a bed, hardly conscious of what had happened; my eyes wandered round the room as if to seek something that I had lost.

After an interval I arose, and as if by instinct, crawled into the room where the corpse of my beloved lay. There were women weeping around; I hung over it and joined my sad tears to theirs; all this time no distinct idea presented itself to my mind, but my thoughts rambled to various subjects, reflecting confusedly on my misfortunes and their cause. I was bewildered, in a cloud of wonder and horror. The death of William, the execution of Justine, the murder of Clerval, and lastly of my wife; even at that moment I knew not that my only remaining friends were safe from the malignity of the fiend; my father even now might be writhing under his grasp, and Ernest might be dead at his feet. This idea made me shudder and recalled me to action. I started up and resolved to return to Geneva with all possible speed.

There were no horses to be procured, and I must return by the lake; but the wind was unfavourable, and the rain fell in torrents. However, it was hardly morning, and I might reasonably hope to arrive by night. I hired men to row and took an oar myself, for I had always experienced relief from mental torment in bodily exercise. But the overflowing misery I now felt, and the excess of agitation that I endured rendered me incapable of any exertion. I threw down the oar, and leaning my head upon my hands, gave way to every gloomy idea that arose. If I looked up, I saw scenes which were familiar to me in my happier time and which I had contemplated but the day before in the company of her who was now but a shadow and a recollection. Tears streamed from my eyes. The rain had ceased for a moment, and I saw the fish play in the waters as they had done a few hours before; they had then been observed by Elizabeth. Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change. The sun might shine or the clouds might lower, but nothing could appear to me as it had done the day before. A fiend had snatched from me every hope of future happiness; no creature had ever been so miserable as I was; so frightful an event is single in the history of man.

But why should I dwell upon the incidents that followed this last overwhelming event? Mine has been a tale of horrors; I have reached their acme, and what I must now relate can but be tedious to you. Know that, one by one, my friends were snatched away; I was left desolate. My own strength is exhausted, and I must tell, in a few words, what remains of my hideous narration.

I arrived at Geneva. My father and Ernest yet lived, but the former sunk under the tidings that I bore. I see him now, excellent and venerable old man! His eyes wandered in vacancy, for they had lost their charm and their delight—his Elizabeth, his more than daughter, whom he doted on with all that affection which a man feels, who in the decline of life, having few affections, clings more earnestly to those that remain. Cursed, cursed be the fiend that brought misery on his grey hairs and doomed him to waste in wretchedness! He could not live under the horrors that were accumulated around him; the springs of existence suddenly gave way; he was unable to rise from his bed, and in a few days he died in my arms.

What then became of me? I know not; I lost sensation, and chains and darkness were the only objects that pressed upon me. Sometimes, indeed, I dreamt that I wandered in flowery meadows and pleasant vales with the friends of my youth, but I awoke and found myself in a dungeon. Melancholy followed, but by degrees I gained a clear conception of my miseries and situation and was then released from my prison. For they had called me mad, and during many months, as I understood, a solitary cell had been my habitation.

Liberty, however, had been a useless gift to me, had I not, as I awakened to reason, at the same time awakened to revenge. As the memory of past misfortunes pressed upon me, I began to reflect on their cause—the monster whom I had created, the miserable dæmon whom I had sent abroad into the world for my destruction. I was possessed by a maddening rage when I thought of him, and desired and ardently prayed that I might have him within my grasp to wreak a great and signal revenge on his cursed head.

Nor did my hate long confine itself to useless wishes; I began to reflect on the best means of securing him; and for this purpose, about a month after my release, I repaired to a criminal judge in the town and told him that I had an accusation to make, that I knew the destroyer of my family, and that I required him to exert his whole authority for the apprehension of the murderer.

The magistrate listened to me with attention and kindness. “Be assured, sir,” said he, “no pains or exertions on my part shall be spared to discover the villain.”

“I thank you,” replied I; “listen, therefore, to the deposition that I have to make. It is indeed a tale so strange that I should fear you would not credit it were there not something in truth which, however wonderful, forces conviction. The story is too connected to be mistaken for a dream, and I have no motive for falsehood.” My manner as I thus addressed him was impressive but calm; I had formed in my own heart a resolution to pursue my destroyer to death, and this purpose quieted my agony and for an interval reconciled me to life. I now related my history briefly but with firmness and precision, marking the dates with accuracy and never deviating into invective or exclamation.

The magistrate appeared at first perfectly incredulous, but as I continued he became more attentive and interested; I saw him sometimes shudder with horror; at others a lively surprise, unmingled with disbelief, was painted on his countenance.

When I had concluded my narration, I said, “This is the being whom I accuse and for whose seizure and punishment I call upon you to exert your whole power. It is your duty as a magistrate, and I believe and hope that your feelings as a man will not revolt from the execution of those functions on this occasion.”

This address caused a considerable change in the physiognomy of my own auditor. He had heard my story with that half kind of belief that is given to a tale of spirits and supernatural events; but when he was called upon to act officially in consequence, the whole tide of his incredulity returned. He, however, answered mildly, “I would willingly afford you every aid in your pursuit, but the creature of whom you speak appears to have powers which would put all my exertions to defiance. Who can follow an animal which can traverse the sea of ice and inhabit caves and dens where no man would venture to intrude? Besides, some months have elapsed since the commission of his crimes, and no one can conjecture to what place he has wandered or what region he may now inhabit.”

“I do not doubt that he hovers near the spot which I inhabit, and if he has indeed taken refuge in the Alps, he may be hunted like the chamois and destroyed as a beast of prey. But I perceive your thoughts; you do not credit my narrative and do not intend to pursue my enemy with the punishment which is his desert.”

As I spoke, rage sparkled in my eyes; the magistrate was intimidated. “You are mistaken,” said he. “I will exert myself, and if it is in my power to seize the monster, be assured that he shall suffer punishment proportionate to his crimes. But I fear, from what you have yourself described to be his properties, that this will prove impracticable; and thus, while every proper measure is pursued, you should make up your mind to disappointment.”

“That cannot be; but all that I can say will be of little avail. My revenge is of no moment to you; yet, while I allow it to be a vice, I confess that it is the devouring and only passion of my soul. My rage is unspeakable when I reflect that the murderer, whom I have turned loose upon society, still exists. You refuse my just demand; I have but one resource, and I devote myself, either in my life or death, to his destruction.”

I trembled with excess of agitation as I said this; there was a frenzy in my manner, and something, I doubt not, of that haughty fierceness which the martyrs of old are said to have possessed. But to a Genevan magistrate, whose mind was occupied by far other ideas than those of devotion and heroism, this elevation of mind had much the appearance of madness. He endeavoured to soothe me as a nurse does a child and reverted to my tale as the effects of delirium.

“Man,” I cried, “how ignorant art thou in thy pride of wisdom! Cease; you know not what it is you say.”

I broke from the house angry and disturbed and retired to meditate on some other mode of action.

This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

Frankenstein – Ch. 17

Frankenstein – Ch. 17

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

The being finished speaking and fixed his looks upon me in the expectation of a reply. But I was bewildered, perplexed, and unable to arrange my ideas sufficiently to understand the full extent of his proposition. He continued,

“You must create a female for me with whom I can live in the interchange of those sympathies necessary for my being. This you alone can do, and I demand it of you as a right which you must not refuse to concede.”

The latter part of his tale had kindled anew in me the anger that had died away while he narrated his peaceful life among the cottagers, and as he said this I could no longer suppress the rage that burned within me.

“I do refuse it,” I replied; “and no torture shall ever extort a consent from me. You may render me the most miserable of men, but you shall never make me base in my own eyes. Shall I create another like yourself, whose joint wickedness might desolate the world. Begone! I have answered you; you may torture me, but I will never consent.”

“You are in the wrong,” replied the fiend; “and instead of threatening, I am content to reason with you. I am malicious because I am miserable. Am I not shunned and hated by all mankind? You, my creator, would tear me to pieces and triumph; remember that, and tell me why I should pity man more than he pities me? You would not call it murder if you could precipitate me into one of those ice-rifts and destroy my frame, the work of your own hands. Shall I respect man when he condemns me? Let him live with me in the interchange of kindness, and instead of injury I would bestow every benefit upon him with tears of gratitude at his acceptance. But that cannot be; the human senses are insurmountable barriers to our union. Yet mine shall not be the submission of abject slavery. I will revenge my injuries; if I cannot inspire love, I will cause fear, and chiefly towards you my arch-enemy, because my creator, do I swear inextinguishable hatred. Have a care; I will work at your destruction, nor finish until I desolate your heart, so that you shall curse the hour of your birth.”

A fiendish rage animated him as he said this; his face was wrinkled into contortions too horrible for human eyes to behold; but presently he calmed himself and proceeded—
“I intended to reason. This passion is detrimental to me, for you do not reflect that you are the cause of its excess. If any being felt emotions of benevolence towards me, I should return them a hundred and a hundredfold; for that one creature’s sake I would make peace with the whole kind! But I now indulge in dreams of bliss that cannot be realised. What I ask of you is reasonable and moderate; I demand a creature of another sex, but as hideous as myself; the gratification is small, but it is all that I can receive, and it shall content me. It is true, we shall be monsters, cut off from all the world; but on that account we shall be more attached to one another. Our lives will not be happy, but they will be harmless and free from the misery I now feel. Oh! My creator, make me happy; let me feel gratitude towards you for one benefit! Let me see that I excite the sympathy of some existing thing; do not deny me my request!”

I was moved. I shuddered when I thought of the possible consequences of my consent, but I felt that there was some justice in his argument. His tale and the feelings he now expressed proved him to be a creature of fine sensations, and did I not as his maker owe him all the portion of happiness that it was in my power to bestow? He saw my change of feeling and continued,
“If you consent, neither you nor any other human being shall ever see us again; I will go to the vast wilds of South America. My food is not that of man; I do not destroy the lamb and the kid to glut my appetite; acorns and berries afford me sufficient nourishment. My companion will be of the same nature as myself and will be content with the same fare. We shall make our bed of dried leaves; the sun will shine on us as on man and will ripen our food. The picture I present to you is peaceful and human, and you must feel that you could deny it only in the wantonness of power and cruelty. Pitiless as you have been towards me, I now see compassion in your eyes; let me seize the favourable moment and persuade you to promise what I so ardently desire.”

“You propose,” replied I, “to fly from the habitations of man, to dwell in those wilds where the beasts of the field will be your only companions. How can you, who long for the love and sympathy of man, persevere in this exile? You will return and again seek their kindness, and you will meet with their detestation; your evil passions will be renewed, and you will then have a companion to aid you in the task of destruction. This may not be; cease to argue the point, for I cannot consent.”

“How inconstant are your feelings! But a moment ago you were moved by my representations, and why do you again harden yourself to my complaints? I swear to you, by the earth which I inhabit, and by you that made me, that with the companion you bestow, I will quit the neighbourhood of man and dwell, as it may chance, in the most savage of places. My evil passions will have fled, for I shall meet with sympathy! My life will flow quietly away, and in my dying moments I shall not curse my maker.”

His words had a strange effect upon me. I compassionated him and sometimes felt a wish to console him, but when I looked upon him, when I saw the filthy mass that moved and talked, my heart sickened and my feelings were altered to those of horror and hatred. I tried to stifle these sensations; I thought that as I could not sympathise with him, I had no right to withhold from him the small portion of happiness which was yet in my power to bestow.
“You swear,” I said, “to be harmless; but have you not already shown a degree of malice that should reasonably make me distrust you? May not even this be a feint that will increase your triumph by affording a wider scope for your revenge?”

“How is this? I must not be trifled with, and I demand an answer. If I have no ties and no affections, hatred and vice must be my portion; the love of another will destroy the cause of my crimes, and I shall become a thing of whose existence everyone will be ignorant. My vices are the children of a forced solitude that I abhor, and my virtues will necessarily arise when I live in communion with an equal. I shall feel the affections of a sensitive being and become linked to the chain of existence and events from which I am now excluded.”

I paused some time to reflect on all he had related and the various arguments which he had employed. I thought of the promise of virtues which he had displayed on the opening of his existence and the subsequent blight of all kindly feeling by the loathing and scorn which his protectors had manifested towards him. His power and threats were not omitted in my calculations; a creature who could exist in the ice-caves of the glaciers and hide himself from pursuit among the ridges of inaccessible precipices was a being possessing faculties it would be vain to cope with. After a long pause of reflection I concluded that the justice due both to him and my fellow creatures demanded of me that I should comply with his request. Turning to him, therefore, I said,

[Our Intervention To Build a Better Monster #1 begins here.]

[Continue reading after you’ve finished “To Build a Better Monster #2”:]

“I consent to your demand, on your solemn oath to quit Europe for ever, and every other place in the neighbourhood of man, as soon as I shall deliver into your hands a female who will accompany you in your exile.”

“I swear,” he cried, “by the sun, and by the blue sky of heaven, and by the fire of love that burns my heart, that if you grant my prayer, while they exist you shall never behold me again. Depart to your home and commence your labours; I shall watch their progress with unutterable anxiety; and fear not but that when you are ready I shall appear.”

Saying this, he suddenly quitted me, fearful, perhaps, of any change in my sentiments. I saw him descend the mountain with greater speed than the flight of an eagle, and quickly lost among the undulations of the sea of ice.

His tale had occupied the whole day, and the sun was upon the verge of the horizon when he departed. I knew that I ought to hasten my descent towards the valley, as I should soon be encompassed in darkness; but my heart was heavy, and my steps slow. The labour of winding among the little paths of the mountain and fixing my feet firmly as I advanced perplexed me, occupied as I was by the emotions which the occurrences of the day had produced. Night was far advanced when I came to the halfway resting-place and seated myself beside the fountain. The stars shone at intervals as the clouds passed from over them; the dark pines rose before me, and every here and there a broken tree lay on the ground; it was a scene of wonderful solemnity and stirred strange thoughts within me. I wept bitterly, and clasping my hands in agony, I exclaimed, “Oh! stars and clouds and winds, ye are all about to mock me; if ye really pity me, crush sensation and memory; let me become as nought; but if not, depart, depart, and leave me in darkness.”

These were wild and miserable thoughts, but I cannot describe to you how the eternal twinkling of the stars weighed upon me and how I listened to every blast of wind as if it were a dull ugly siroc on its way to consume me.

Morning dawned before I arrived at the village of Chamounix; I took no rest, but returned immediately to Geneva. Even in my own heart I could give no expression to my sensations—they weighed on me with a mountain’s weight and their excess destroyed my agony beneath them. Thus I returned home, and entering the house, presented myself to the family. My haggard and wild appearance awoke intense alarm, but I answered no question, scarcely did I speak. I felt as if I were placed under a ban—as if I had no right to claim their sympathies—as if never more might I enjoy companionship with them. Yet even thus I loved them to adoration; and to save them, I resolved to dedicate myself to my most abhorred task. The prospect of such an occupation made every other circumstance of existence pass before me like a dream, and that thought only had to me the reality of life.

This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

Frankenstein – Ch. 8

Frankenstein – Ch. 8

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

We passed a few sad hours until eleven o’clock, when the trial was to commence. My father and the rest of the family being obliged to attend as witnesses, I accompanied them to the court. During the whole of this wretched mockery of justice I suffered living torture. It was to be decided whether the result of my curiosity and lawless devices would cause the death of two of my fellow beings: one a smiling babe full of innocence and joy, the other far more dreadfully murdered, with every aggravation of infamy that could make the murder memorable in horror. Justine also was a girl of merit and possessed qualities which promised to render her life happy; now all was to be obliterated in an ignominious grave, and I the cause! A thousand times rather would I have confessed myself guilty of the crime ascribed to Justine, but I was absent when it was committed, and such a declaration would have been considered as the ravings of a madman and would not have exculpated her who suffered through me.

The appearance of Justine was calm. She was dressed in mourning, and her countenance, always engaging, was rendered, by the solemnity of her feelings, exquisitely beautiful. Yet she appeared confident in innocence and did not tremble, although gazed on and execrated by thousands, for all the kindness which her beauty might otherwise have excited was obliterated in the minds of the spectators by the imagination of the enormity she was supposed to have committed. She was tranquil, yet her tranquillity was evidently constrained; and as her confusion had before been adduced as a proof of her guilt, she worked up her mind to an appearance of courage. When she entered the court she threw her eyes round it and quickly discovered where we were seated. A tear seemed to dim her eye when she saw us, but she quickly recovered herself, and a look of sorrowful affection seemed to attest her utter guiltlessness.
The trial began, and after the advocate against her had stated the charge, several witnesses were called. Several strange facts combined against her, which might have staggered anyone who had not such proof of her innocence as I had. She had been out the whole of the night on which the murder had been committed and towards morning had been perceived by a market-woman not far from the spot where the body of the murdered child had been afterwards found. The woman asked her what she did there, but she looked very strangely and only returned a confused and unintelligible answer. She returned to the house about eight o’clock, and when one inquired where she had passed the night, she replied that she had been looking for the child and demanded earnestly if anything had been heard concerning him. When shown the body, she fell into violent hysterics and kept her bed for several days. The picture was then produced which the servant had found in her pocket; and when Elizabeth, in a faltering voice, proved that it was the same which, an hour before the child had been missed, she had placed round his neck, a murmur of horror and indignation filled the court.

Justine was called on for her defence. As the trial had proceeded, her countenance had altered. Surprise, horror, and misery were strongly expressed. Sometimes she struggled with her tears, but when she was desired to plead, she collected her powers and spoke in an audible although variable voice.

“God knows,” she said, “how entirely I am innocent. But I do not pretend that my protestations should acquit me; I rest my innocence on a plain and simple explanation of the facts which have been adduced against me, and I hope the character I have always borne will incline my judges to a favourable interpretation where any circumstance appears doubtful or suspicious.”
She then related that, by the permission of Elizabeth, she had passed the evening of the night on which the murder had been committed at the house of an aunt at Chêne, a village situated at about a league from Geneva. On her return, at about nine o’clock, she met a man who asked her if she had seen anything of the child who was lost. She was alarmed by this account and passed several hours in looking for him, when the gates of Geneva were shut, and she was forced to remain several hours of the night in a barn belonging to a cottage, being unwilling to call up the inhabitants, to whom she was well known. Most of the night she spent here watching; towards morning she believed that she slept for a few minutes; some steps disturbed her, and she awoke. It was dawn, and she quitted her asylum, that she might again endeavour to find my brother. If she had gone near the spot where his body lay, it was without her knowledge. That she had been bewildered when questioned by the market-woman was not surprising, since she had passed a sleepless night and the fate of poor William was yet uncertain. Concerning the picture she could give no account.

“I know,” continued the unhappy victim, “how heavily and fatally this one circumstance weighs against me, but I have no power of explaining it; and when I have expressed my utter ignorance, I am only left to conjecture concerning the probabilities by which it might have been placed in my pocket. But here also I am checked. I believe that I have no enemy on earth, and none surely would have been so wicked as to destroy me wantonly. Did the murderer place it there? I know of no opportunity afforded him for so doing; or, if I had, why should he have stolen the jewel, to part with it again so soon?

“I commit my cause to the justice of my judges, yet I see no room for hope. I beg permission to have a few witnesses examined concerning my character, and if their testimony shall not overweigh my supposed guilt, I must be condemned, although I would pledge my salvation on my innocence.”

Several witnesses were called who had known her for many years, and they spoke well of her; but fear and hatred of the crime of which they supposed her guilty rendered them timorous and unwilling to come forward. Elizabeth saw even this last resource, her excellent dispositions and irreproachable conduct, about to fail the accused, when, although violently agitated, she desired permission to address the court.

“I am,” said she, “the cousin of the unhappy child who was murdered, or rather his sister, for I was educated by and have lived with his parents ever since and even long before his birth. It may therefore be judged indecent in me to come forward on this occasion, but when I see a fellow creature about to perish through the cowardice of her pretended friends, I wish to be allowed to speak, that I may say what I know of her character. I am well acquainted with the accused. I have lived in the same house with her, at one time for five and at another for nearly two years. During all that period she appeared to me the most amiable and benevolent of human creatures. She nursed Madame Frankenstein, my aunt, in her last illness, with the greatest affection and care and afterwards attended her own mother during a tedious illness, in a manner that excited the admiration of all who knew her, after which she again lived in my uncle’s house, where she was beloved by all the family. She was warmly attached to the child who is now dead and acted towards him like a most affectionate mother. For my own part, I do not hesitate to say that, notwithstanding all the evidence produced against her, I believe and rely on her perfect innocence. She had no temptation for such an action; as to the bauble on which the chief proof rests, if she had earnestly desired it, I should have willingly given it to her, so much do I esteem and value her.”

[Our Intervention Justine Found Innocent begins here.]

[Continue reading after you’ve finished “Justine Found Innocent”:]

A murmur of approbation followed Elizabeth’s simple and powerful appeal, but it was excited by her generous interference, and not in favour of poor Justine, on whom the public indignation was turned with renewed violence, charging her with the blackest ingratitude. She herself wept as Elizabeth spoke, but she did not answer. My own agitation and anguish was extreme during the whole trial. I believed in her innocence; I knew it. Could the dæmon who had (I did not for a minute doubt) murdered my brother also in his hellish sport have betrayed the innocent to death and ignominy? I could not sustain the horror of my situation, and when I perceived that the popular voice and the countenances of the judges had already condemned my unhappy victim, I rushed out of the court in agony. The tortures of the accused did not equal mine; she was sustained by innocence, but the fangs of remorse tore my bosom and would not forgo their hold.

I passed a night of unmingled wretchedness. In the morning I went to the court; my lips and throat were parched. I dared not ask the fatal question, but I was known, and the officer guessed the cause of my visit. The ballots had been thrown; they were all black, and Justine was condemned.

I cannot pretend to describe what I then felt. I had before experienced sensations of horror, and I have endeavoured to bestow upon them adequate expressions, but words cannot convey an idea of the heart-sickening despair that I then endured. The person to whom I addressed myself added that Justine had already confessed her guilt. “That evidence,” he observed, “was hardly required in so glaring a case, but I am glad of it, and, indeed, none of our judges like to condemn a criminal upon circumstantial evidence, be it ever so decisive.”

This was strange and unexpected intelligence; what could it mean? Had my eyes deceived me? And was I really as mad as the whole world would believe me to be if I disclosed the object of my suspicions? I hastened to return home, and Elizabeth eagerly demanded the result.
“My cousin,” replied I, “it is decided as you may have expected; all judges had rather that ten innocent should suffer than that one guilty should escape. But she has confessed.”
This was a dire blow to poor Elizabeth, who had relied with firmness upon Justine’s innocence. “Alas!” said she. “How shall I ever again believe in human goodness? Justine, whom I loved and esteemed as my sister, how could she put on those smiles of innocence only to betray? Her mild eyes seemed incapable of any severity or guile, and yet she has committed a murder.”

Soon after we heard that the poor victim had expressed a desire to see my cousin. My father wished her not to go but said that he left it to her own judgment and feelings to decide. “Yes,” said Elizabeth, “I will go, although she is guilty; and you, Victor, shall accompany me; I cannot go alone.” The idea of this visit was torture to me, yet I could not refuse.
We entered the gloomy prison chamber and beheld Justine sitting on some straw at the farther end; her hands were manacled, and her head rested on her knees. She rose on seeing us enter, and when we were left alone with her, she threw herself at the feet of Elizabeth, weeping bitterly. My cousin wept also.

“Oh, Justine!” said she. “Why did you rob me of my last consolation? I relied on your innocence, and although I was then very wretched, I was not so miserable as I am now.”
“And do you also believe that I am so very, very wicked? Do you also join with my enemies to crush me, to condemn me as a murderer?” Her voice was suffocated with sobs.

“Rise, my poor girl,” said Elizabeth; “why do you kneel, if you are innocent? I am not one of your enemies, I believed you guiltless, notwithstanding every evidence, until I heard that you had yourself declared your guilt. That report, you say, is false; and be assured, dear Justine, that nothing can shake my confidence in you for a moment, but your own confession.”
“I did confess, but I confessed a lie. I confessed, that I might obtain absolution; but now that falsehood lies heavier at my heart than all my other sins. The God of heaven forgive me! Ever since I was condemned, my confessor has besieged me; he threatened and menaced, until I almost began to think that I was the monster that he said I was. He threatened excommunication and hell fire in my last moments if I continued obdurate. Dear lady, I had none to support me; all looked on me as a wretch doomed to ignominy and perdition. What could I do? In an evil hour I subscribed to a lie; and now only am I truly miserable.”

She paused, weeping, and then continued, “I thought with horror, my sweet lady, that you should believe your Justine, whom your blessed aunt had so highly honoured, and whom you loved, was a creature capable of a crime which none but the devil himself could have perpetrated. Dear William! dearest blessed child! I soon shall see you again in heaven, where we shall all be happy; and that consoles me, going as I am to suffer ignominy and death.”
“Oh, Justine! Forgive me for having for one moment distrusted you. Why did you confess? But do not mourn, dear girl. Do not fear. I will proclaim, I will prove your innocence. I will melt the stony hearts of your enemies by my tears and prayers. You shall not die! You, my playfellow, my companion, my sister, perish on the scaffold! No! No! I never could survive so horrible a misfortune.”

Justine shook her head mournfully. “I do not fear to die,” she said; “that pang is past. God raises my weakness and gives me courage to endure the worst. I leave a sad and bitter world; and if you remember me and think of me as of one unjustly condemned, I am resigned to the fate awaiting me. Learn from me, dear lady, to submit in patience to the will of heaven!”
During this conversation I had retired to a corner of the prison room, where I could conceal the horrid anguish that possessed me. Despair! Who dared talk of that? The poor victim, who on the morrow was to pass the awful boundary between life and death, felt not, as I did, such deep and bitter agony. I gnashed my teeth and ground them together, uttering a groan that came from my inmost soul. Justine started. When she saw who it was, she approached me and said, “Dear sir, you are very kind to visit me; you, I hope, do not believe that I am guilty?”
I could not answer. “No, Justine,” said Elizabeth; “he is more convinced of your innocence than I was, for even when he heard that you had confessed, he did not credit it.”

“I truly thank him. In these last moments I feel the sincerest gratitude towards those who think of me with kindness. How sweet is the affection of others to such a wretch as I am! It removes more than half my misfortune, and I feel as if I could die in peace now that my innocence is acknowledged by you, dear lady, and your cousin.”

Thus the poor sufferer tried to comfort others and herself. She indeed gained the resignation she desired. But I, the true murderer, felt the never-dying worm alive in my bosom, which allowed of no hope or consolation. Elizabeth also wept and was unhappy, but hers also was the misery of innocence, which, like a cloud that passes over the fair moon, for a while hides but cannot tarnish its brightness. Anguish and despair had penetrated into the core of my heart; I bore a hell within me which nothing could extinguish. We stayed several hours with Justine, and it was with great difficulty that Elizabeth could tear herself away. “I wish,” cried she, “that I were to die with you; I cannot live in this world of misery.”

Justine assumed an air of cheerfulness, while she with difficulty repressed her bitter tears. She embraced Elizabeth and said in a voice of half-suppressed emotion, “Farewell, sweet lady, dearest Elizabeth, my beloved and only friend; may heaven, in its bounty, bless and preserve you; may this be the last misfortune that you will ever suffer! Live, and be happy, and make others so.”

And on the morrow Justine died. Elizabeth’s heart-rending eloquence failed to move the judges from their settled conviction in the criminality of the saintly sufferer. My passionate and indignant appeals were lost upon them. And when I received their cold answers and heard the harsh, unfeeling reasoning of these men, my purposed avowal died away on my lips. Thus I might proclaim myself a madman, but not revoke the sentence passed upon my wretched victim. She perished on the scaffold as a murderess!

From the tortures of my own heart, I turned to contemplate the deep and voiceless grief of my Elizabeth. This also was my doing! And my father’s woe, and the desolation of that late so smiling home all was the work of my thrice-accursed hands! Ye weep, unhappy ones, but these are not your last tears! Again shall you raise the funeral wail, and the sound of your lamentations shall again and again be heard! Frankenstein, your son, your kinsman, your early, much-loved friend; he who would spend each vital drop of blood for your sakes, who has no thought nor sense of joy except as it is mirrored also in your dear countenances, who would fill the air with blessings and spend his life in serving you—he bids you weep, to shed countless tears; happy beyond his hopes, if thus inexorable fate be satisfied, and if the destruction pause before the peace of the grave have succeeded to your sad torments!
Thus spoke my prophetic soul, as, torn by remorse, horror, and despair, I beheld those I loved spend vain sorrow upon the graves of William and Justine, the first hapless victims to my unhallowed arts.

The Revelation of the Young Werther

The Revelation of the Young Werther

[Fixing Frankenstein chapters]

[This is Amble Whistletown’s and Bartleby Willard’s translation of Bartleby Willard’s Die Offenbarung des Jungen Werthers]

The Revelation of the Young Werther
A true, albeit strange, tale
— experienced and writ down by Elizabeth Frankenstein

Soon I lost all consciousness of the outside world. It seemed to me — and the others later confirmed the impression — that we now all moved together through a long, arched tunnel. The hall was large and splendid as a cathedral — but instead of stone blocks and wooden beams, the walls and vaulted ceiling were composed entirely of flickering images. We strolled through scenes from the book, arranged in chronological order.

We saw (but did not hear — the tunnel was silent) Lotte and Werther at their first meeting in her living room, with her siblings cavorting on all sides; and then Lotte and Werther dancing in joyous harmony across the floor; but then also Lottes’s embarrassment, followed by Werther’s (inadequately established and sustained) moments of first despair. “Here she says to him, ‘Albert is a good man with an honest heart, to whom I am as good as engaged,” whispered Justine. “Indeed,” agreed Vuh quietly.

And so we advanced down the tunnel as the story playing over our heads likewise advanced. Albert comes home and the three try to be friends, but Werther cracks more and more under the strain of frustrated passion, until finally accepting a position in Weimar, in the hope that living 200 miles from Walheim will cure him of his obsession. His life in Weimar and the charming acquaintance of a charming young woman are, however, quickly undone by an unfortunate public embarrassment (or perhaps more from Werther’s exaggerated sensitivity). He returns to the Walheim area to be again near Lotte, who has meanwhiles married Albert. And everything gets worse and worse.

I should mention that all subplots also floated overhead — even those parts of the epistolatory novel that occurred only in Werther’s troubled thoughts: one saw, for example, Werther at his writing desk, the words he wrote, the accompanying (as a rule hyperbolic) expressions of his face and body, and sometimes images of surrounding recollections as well.
We made it to the last scene between Werther and Lotte — where he reads her his translation of the Celtic epic poem Ossian, by which they’re both undone and collapse in tears warm and rich; at which point he embraces her and presses his lips to hers; she repels him and flees, proclaiming from behind the locked door of an adjoining room that he may never again come to her. (Readers of the original will know that on the next day, as planned, Werther kills himself.)

Here, as across the ceiling and walls the pair bawl, Victor lifted his arm and we all stopped. “We went too far! We have to go back a bit — even though this is the scene we seek to revise.” And then he explained his idea.

He premised his plan on literature’s effect on human nature. Though Clerval and Vuh found Victor’s reasoning convincing — at least in principle —, neither could shake the worry that by this point in the story Werther was already too unmoored for us to rely solely upon a literary rescue. “That may well be,” agreed Victor, “You two remain near the unfortunate soul’s room — in the event that poesy fail us.”

Wednesday, December 22, 1772

Lee, Vuh, Victor, Clerval, Justine and I arrived in Wetzler [Editor’s Note: Town near Walheim; Werther is staying there so he can be close to Lotte]. Werther was away and wouldn’t return for several hours. Vuh and Clerval went to stand vigil at Werther’s lodgings. Before departing the hall of flickering book-scenes, Victor, Vuh, Justine and imaged horses — to ride through the fiction upon. But Justine — romantic young thing that she is — had dreamed too much verve into her horse. Her black stallion neighed frantically, throwing his head (complete with the white diamond under the giant glossy black eyes) in every possible direction, and kicking wildly, careening errantly this way and that. Victor stayed behind with Justine, to calm the manic daydream, and find him a stable. Lee and I rode to Walheim with the emergency literature.

We knew Lotte would be alone from approximately five to half-seven in the evening. The predetermined drawer sat near an open window — near enough, we’d estimated from our observations of the book, for Lee’s long arms to reach from outside. We had only to await the right moment.

At first, a couple comedies of error. Charlotte left the room; Lee opened the drawer and tapped around for Ossian; Charlotte suddenly returned; Lee retracted her long thin arm without shutting the drawer behind her; Lotte scratched her head and shut the drawer; the entire process was repeated a second time, but this time Lotte looked about in anxious bewilderment before pressing her hip to the drawer and slamming it shut with her full weight. Time was running out.

“Lift me through the window,” I shout-whispered to Lee.

“What?” said Lee.

“Now!” I said, pulling the selected reading out of her hand.

In one effortless, flowing movement, Lee moved me up, through the window, and onto the hardwood floor boards.

Fortunately, Lotte did not cry out, but remained perfectly silent. She sat on the sofa across from me. Her dainty jaw dropped ever so slightly, staring at me as if I were impossible.

“Please forgive the disturbance. However, I must request your assistance. You must replace Werther’s translation of Ossian with this passage. Here, I’ll do it myself. Ossian we hide deep in this book, lying conveniently on the table; and there, where Ossian was, we place this gentler, sweeter language. Ossian is a particularly detrimental literature for what’s about to transpire. This is a much more suitable. But I implore you, please act as if you believed that Ossian were yet here in this drawer, and bid Werther read it to you. And please not a word of my visit — to anyone! I greatly regret our lack of finesse in this intervention, but I do believe that if you could nonetheless behave naturally, and — as I’ve suggested — request he read his Ossian to you, and of course then he finds only this text, which can’t help but surprise you both, but then if you could yet press on and opine that you’re now very desirous that he read you this new, unaccounted-for selection — . If you could please perform all of that as cleverly and theatrically as you can, I believe we might yet succeed. I beg, once again, your forgiveness for the — honestly not exactly plan-true — disruption.”

I turned and stepped back towards the window. Lotte said softly — very softly, as she’d not yet fully regained her power of speech — “Please, please stop. I do not understand.” Then I turned to her very serious and sympathetic and — with the gentlest smile and as tears wobbled in my eyes — replied, “You don’t have to understand everything, Lotte.” And then she was quiet, her eyes large and fixed within my own; after a moment where our gazes — liking old friends reluctantly parting — held, supported and cherished one another, Charlotte gave a very slight but meaningful and whole-hearted nod.

I climbed into Lee’s waiting arms and the two of us hid in the hedge as the story’s action headed our way.

[From the final pages of Johann Wolfgang von Goethes Die Leiden des Jungen Werthers (The Sorrows of the Young Werther):]

[Editor’s Note: The below selection was translated by R.D. Boylan in 1854 (1854 Editor: Nathen Haskell Dole, with a lot of 2021 touch-ups by Amble Whistletown). Amble agreed with Boylan’s decision to use the “thee” and “thou” forms when translating the German informal — both when Goethe used it, and later, when Bartleby did. This allows the English reader to see when the German used “Sie” (formal “You”; the original equivalent was the now all-purpose “You”), versus “du” (informal “You”; the original equivalent being the now obsolete “Thou”).]

On Monday morning, the twenty-first of December, he wrote Charlotte the following letter, which was found sealed on his bureau after his death and given to her. I shall insert it in fragments as it appears, from several circumstances, to have been written in that manner.

“It is decided, Lotte, I want to die. I make this declaration deliberately and coolly, without any romanticism, on the morning of the day when I shall see thee for the last. As thou read these lines, O best of women, the cold grave will hold the rigid remains of that restless and unhappy soul who, in the last moments of his existence, knows no pleasure so great as that of thy conversation. I have passed a dreadful night. Or rather, let me say, an auspicious one — for it has given me resolution, it has fixed my purpose: I want to die. How I tore myself from thee yesterday, in the terrible tumult of my senses — how everything that clutched and crushed my heart and my hopeless, friendless existence — so close by thy side and yet so far from thy nearness — seized and spun me in cold, clammy nausea! I could scarcely reach my room. I threw myself onto my knees, and O God!, Thou granted a final respite in the most bitter tears. A thousand ideas, a thousand schemes raged across my soul; and finally one last, fixed, sole thought: I want to die! I lay myself down, and in the morning, in the quiet hour of awakening, the resolution remained in my heart, firm and powerful: I want to die! It is not despair; it is certitude — a resolution that I shall sacrifice myself for thee. Yes, Charlotte, why suppress — why hide it? One of us three must away, and I want to be the one. O beloved Charlotte! This tattered heart has often in its underhanded rage and fury snuck about, toying with thoughts of murdering thy husband — thee! — me! — so be it! In the bright, quiet evenings of summer, when thou sometimes wander up towards the mountains, let thy thoughts then turn to me: how I so oft came up from the valley. And then gaze across the churchyard until thou find my grave, and, by the light of the setting sun, mark how the evening breeze waves the tall grasses growing above my tomb to and fro. I was calm when I began this letter, but now, now I weep like a little boy, as these impressions of a precious past and an empty future dance vividly about.”

About ten in the morning, Werther called his servant, and, whilst dressing, told him that in a few days he intended to set out upon a journey, and bade him therefore lay his clothes in order, and prepare them for packing up, call in all his accounts, fetch home the books he had lent, and give two months’ pay to the poor dependents who were accustomed to receive from him a weekly allowance.

He breakfasted in his room and then mounted his horse and went to visit the steward, who, however, was not at home. He walked pensively up and down the garden, seemingly wishing to yet heap all the melancholy of memory upon himself.

The children did not suffer him to remain alone long. They followed him, skipping and dancing before him, and told him that after tomorrow and tomorrow and one day more, they were to receive their Christmas gift from Charlotte; and they then recounted all the wonders of which they had formed ideas in their child imaginations. “Tomorrow and tomorrow,” said he, “and one day more!” And he kissed them tenderly. He was going; but the younger boy stopped him, to whisper something in his ear. He told him that his elder brothers had written splendid New-Year’s wishes so large! One for papa, and another for Albert and Charlotte, and one for Werther; and they were to be presented early in the morning, on New Year’s Day. This quite overcame him. He gave them each something, mounted his horse, left his compliments for papa and mamma, and, with tears in his eyes, rode off.

He returned home about five o’clock, ordered the maid to look to his fire and keep it going late into the night. His servant he instructed to pack his books and linen, and to mend his clothes. It is most likely then that he penned the following addition to his final letter to Lotte:

“Thou expects me not. Thou believeth, I would obey, and not visit again till Christmas Eve. O Lotte, today or never more! On Christmas Eve thou holdest this paper in thy hand, trembling and wetting it with thy lovely tears. I will — I must! Oh, how well it stands with me — to be determined!”

In the meanwhile, Charlotte was in a pitiable state of mind. After her last conversation with Werther, she found how painful she would find parting from him, how he’d suffer from the separation.

She had, in conversation with Albert, mentioned casually that Werther would not return before Christmas Eve. Soon thereafter, Albert rode to see a civil servant in the neighborhood with whom he had some business. The distance was such that he’d have to stay the night.
She sat now alone. None of her siblings were nearby. She gave herself up to the reflections that silently rambled, with wild trampling steps, through her mind. She saw herself now forever united to a man whose love and fidelity she knew to be unfailing, to whom she felt a heart-devotion, whose calm and dependable nature seemed a special gift from Heaven upon which a good woman might reliably ground her life’s happiness. She recognized what Albert must be to her and her children, now and forever. And she saw Werther, who’d become so very dear. The cordial unanimity and agreement of their sentiments had been apparent from the very beginning of their acquaintance, and their long association and many of their shared experiences had indelibly marked her heart. She had grown accustomed to sharing every thought and feeling which interested her with him, and his absence threatened to tear a hole in her existence which would never again be mended shut. O, but could she in that moment transform him into her brother! Or if she could marry him to one of her friends — and then she could also perhaps yet fully restore his intimacy with Albert!

She considered one after the other all her closest friends, but found something objectionable in each, and found none to whom she could consent to give him.

Amid all these inner observations she felt deeply for the first time, yet still without permitting herself to completely form and inhabit the thought, that her heart’s secret longing was to keep him for herself. She interrupted the roaring train of these impassioned reflections to shout silently to herself that she could not, may not keep him. With this her pure, beautiful, otherwise so amiable and self-sufficient spirit sagged beneath a melancholy that forbid all prospect of happiness. A vice crushed her heart and dark clouds settled over her mind’s eye.

It was now half-past six o’clock, and she heard Werther’s step on the stairs. She at once recognized his voice, as he inquired if she were at home. Her heart beat audibly — we could almost say for the first time — at his arrival. It was too late to deny herself; and, as he entered, she exclaimed, with a sort of ill-concealed confusion, “You have not kept your word!” “I promised nothing,” he answered. “But you should have complied, at least for my sake,” she continued. “I implore you, for both our sakes.”

She scarcely knew what she said or did; and sent for some friends, who, by their presence, might prevent her being left alone with Werther. He put down some books he had brought with him, then made inquiries about some others, until she began to hope that her friends might arrive shortly, entertaining at the same time a desire that they might stay away.

At one moment she felt anxious that the servant should remain in the adjoining room, then she changed her mind. Werther, meanwhile, walked impatiently up and down. She went to the piano and began a menuetto, but it wouldn’t flow. She took hold of herself and sat down quietly beside Werther, who had taken his usual place on the sofa.

“Have you brought nothing to read?” she inquired. He had nothing. “There in my drawer,” she continued, “you will find your own translation of some of the songs of Ossian. I have not yet read them, as I hoped to hear you recite them, but have not yet been able to arrange it.” He smiled, and went for the manuscript, which he took with a shudder. He sat down; and, eyes full of tears, he began to read.

[Here ends the selection from Johan Wolfgang von Goethe’s Die Leiden des Jungen Werthers]

But then through his tears, Werther noticed that the wrong words lay beneath the right title. “What is this?” he whispered. He labored to breathe, and his body began to totter — like one knifed through the heart. Swaying as he walked, he found his way to the edge of the sofa and sat down. “What have you done, Lotte? The last time. My last time. What have you?” But still they glowed for one another — still the fire between their two bodies and hearts held them aloft and directed the one to the other. A glowing that weaves human souls together to make of two individuals one flesh. The glowing of that sweet pure innocent love that in other circumstances naturally, properly, and prettily leads a pair to embrace, snuggle, and make — from the depths and with the whole of their being — a sincere promise of eternal fidelity. As with Moses and the burning bush did this awareness blaze within and between them. But they both also felt sharp and clear the other inescapable particular of their situation. Werther trembled and, with chin on chest, sobbed quietly to himself.

“Please read. I would like to know what’s written there,” said Lotte with a tender, doleful voice as she moved a little closer and reached over to rest her palm oh so lightly on his shaking shoulder. Her touch — as light and delicate as the rustle of butterfly wings — traversed his body like a lightning bolt and he noticed his shoulders involuntarily straighten up and back, propelling his chest forward. Her hand, her affection, her faith were for him the most powerful of tonics.

He read:

Our church celebrates various holidays that reach deep into the heart. One can scarcely think of anything more delightful than Pentecost, or more serious and holy than Easter. The sorrow and melancholy of Holy Week and then the majesty of Easter Sunday accompany us throughout our lives. The church celebrates one of the most beautiful holidays almost in the middle of winter, when the nights are at their longest and the days their shortest, when the sun tilts most sharply against our fields and snow blankets all the meadows: Christmas. As in many lands the day before the Lord’s birthday celebration is called “Christ’s Eve”, in ours it is called “Holy Eve”; the next day, “the Holy Day”; and the night in between, “the Night of Consecration”. The Catholic Church celebrates Christ’s Day — the savior’s birthday — with its very greatest ecclesiastical pomp. In most areas, the midnight hour itself is sanctified with a resplendent nighttime celebration. The bells chime their invitation through the silent, dark, wintry midnight air. The inhabitants hurry with swinging, shadow-weaving lanterns, or over gloomy, well-known paths from snowy mountains past frosted forests and across creaking orchards to the church, from which come the sacred, solemn sounds, and which, with its long, narrow, light-filled windows, arises from and towers brightly over the middle of the town — enveloped now in ice-sheathed trees.

To the religious holiday a domestic one is added. In almost all Christian lands it is now the custom to present the children the Christ-child’s arrival — himself also a child, the most wonderful the world’s ever known — as a gay, shining, festive occasion: one that continues to work on us throughout our lives; so that sometimes even deep in old age, in the midst of troubled, melancholy or poignant memories, these childhood impressions will fly back to us upon colorful, shimmering wings, carrying us through the desolate, sorrowful, emptied night sky to times now past. It’s customary to give the children gifts, brought by the holy Christ-child, because it makes them so happy. This is usually done on Christmas Eve, as twilight gives way to darkest night. One lights candles, and usually very many, which, held securely in little candle holders, often sway with the beautiful green branches of a fir or spruce tree, standing in the center of the living room. The children are not permitted into the room until the sign is given that the holy Christ has come and left them the gifts he’d brought with him. Then the door is opened; the little ones may enter, and, by the wondrous, glittering play of lights, they see things hanging from the branches of the tree, or perhaps spread across the tabletop — things so far surpassing the wildest fancies of their imaginations that they dare not trust themselves to touch them; and then, when they finally have received these unbelievably special objects, they carry them about the entire evening in their little arms, even taking them to bed with them. When they then now and again hear the tolling of the midnight bells — by which the grownups are called to worship in the church — in their dreams, it seems to them as if little angels bustled through the heavens, or as if the holy Christ were returning home after visiting all the children of the world and leaving each of them a splendid present.

When the following day — Christ’s day — comes, it is so very solemn and festive for the children. They yawn and stretch, wearing their finest clothes, in the toasty living room early in the morning, as father and mother pretty themselves for church. At noon they sit down to an elegant dinner — better than any other dinner in the year. And then in the afternoon, or towards evening, friends and acquaintances come over, sit upon the chairs and benches, chatting with one another and gazing comfortably through the windows at the winter scenery, where either flakes drift slowly down, or a dark thick fog wraps round the mountaintops, or the cold blood-red sun sinks behind the blinking white peaks. In various places throughout the room — on a little chair, or one end of a bench, or the windowsill, lie last night’s enchanting gifts — now more familiar, intimate, and trusted.

Winter passes, then comes spring and the never-ending summer. When their mother once again tells them of the holy Christ — that his birthday celebration is approaching, and that he will visit this time as well, it feels to the children as if an eternity has passed, as if last year’s joy lies in far, gray, foggy distance.

Because this holiday endures for so long, because it’s reflected radiance reaches so far into old age, we like to be present when children celebrate and delight in Christmas.

[Editor’s Note: “Rock Crystal” (rock crystal is a form of quartz prized for its lack of impurities) by Adalbert Stifter was first published (as “The Holy Night”) in 1845. The story then appeared in the short story collection “Multicolored Stones” (or “Motley Stones”, in one recent translation) in 1853. In our story, Victor and his friends travel from a nonfictional offshoot of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein (published 1818 in our world, but never in their world, since in their world their story is not a fiction) into JW v. Goethe’s fictional Die Leiden des Jungen Werthers (first published in 1774, but set in 1772). So how did Victor Frankenstein get his hands on this piece by Adalbert Stifter (who was just thirteen years old in 1818)? The only logical explanation: Victor Frankenstein’s fiction portal could also transport one into books that had not yet been written, and Victor had already — for some reason or other — visited Adalbert Stifter’s “Rock Crystal”.]

Werther leaned back and sank into the sofa. Exhaustion overwhelmed him. But he found the feeling rather cozy and pleasant — like a child who — refusing to avow his lassitude — has been fighting against sleep for hours with all of his dwindling might, and who now finally submits to Lethe and finds therein an unexpected bliss.

(Is this what death is like? We Christians do wrong to so desperately flee the blessed union with our savior awaiting us on the other side of this flimsy, wind-tossed veil. And yet it is the nature of flesh to dread its demise, and thus do we resist and resist. Until finally we can resist no more and collapse into death, where we are then surprised to find the grace that we’d held so feebly with our imperfect, world-tossed faith fully accepting us, loving us, and carrying us up and up into the beating heart of Joy Itself — a grace surpassing the wildest fancies of our imaginations!)

Werther drifted into a deep and still sleep. Lotte wanted to fling her arms around his waist and lay her head in his lap — that she might press her being against his calm breath. Instead, she called the servant to her.

“Werther is not well. Please take him into your bedroom. I apologize for the intrusion, but he is not well and we must let him sleep his fever off.” The old man, who had long served Lotte’s family and who knew only too well the nature and origin of Werther’s affliction, nodded with a soft, benign smile.

Albert arrived home the following day at ten o’clock in the morning. Werther lay yet asleep. Lotte told her husband of the previous night’s incident — without detailing too precisely the particulars. Albert said little. He sat broodingly leaning slightly over the table, broad shoulders tense, high forehead creased, deep eyes scowled. But then Lotte sat across from him and leaned forward, laying her hands on his. She gazed with giant, loving, pained eyes into his narrowed ones and said, relaxed and straightforward, “Your love is the greatest blessing of my life. I know that things with Werther cannot remain as they have been. I believe that he will now also understand that. If not, we’ll have to reconsider our relationship with him. But when he wakes up today, please grant us both a little more patience and welcome him to our home.” Her loving manner and soft words calmed Albert, and as his fear and jealousy faded, the attached anger and impatience also dissolved into a tender concern for his wife and her strange friend.

Werther first appeared — hair combed and face washed — at eleven in the morning. He found Lotte alone the sofa, at needlework. The day was clear and a smooth supple winterlight fell across the window upon her supple form and radiant youth. Werther stood pie-eyed in front of her. “From whence that text, Lotte?”

“You’d not believe me, were I to tell you. It is best understood as the handiwork of faeries. As you perhaps noticed, the handwriting is a woman’s — but not mine.

Werther shrugged his shoulders and put hand to hip. “Be that as it may, I would like to read the fool essay once more.” Lotte replied that it lay on the little table next to the dresser, on top of his Ossian. He stood over the table and read in silence.

“Foolish? No, not entirely. The images and argumentation connect and strengthen one another. Kitschy? Perhaps for some natures upon the first reading, but soon the words seep in, spread out, and begin to work upon the unsuspecting soul.

“In the beginning, concerning Christmas: ‘that continues to work on us throughout our lives; so that sometimes even deep in old age, in the midst of troubled, melancholy or poignant memories, these childhood impressions will fly back to us upon colorful, shimmering wings, carrying us through the desolate, sorrowful, emptied night sky to times now past. It’s customary to give the children gifts, brought by the holy Christ-child, because it makes them so happy.’ ‘Because’, Lotte: ‘because it makes them so happy’!

“And then at the end: ‘Because this holiday endures for so long, because it’s reflected radiance reaches so far into old age, we like to be present when children celebrate and delight in Christmas.’

“Lotte! Is it not written, ‘It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones’ ?! We owe the children the peaceful cyclical progression of local traditions and of life itself. Woe unto him who disrupts the homely simplicity and monotony of the child’s world! Woe unto those who would rob the children’s shimmering, in-the-spring-air-turning and the sunlight-every-which-way-reflecting wings!

“Lotte! I considered sensitivity and intensity the proof of my heart’s purity, but the proof of a pure heart can be found only within the heart itself. In and of itself is passion of little value. The proper employment of passion consists — as with all other human attributes —solely in thinking, feeling, and acting with gentle love and kind resolve. How easily in the drunken frenzy of passion may one deceive oneself about oneself: One possesses the most phenomenal insights, attains to an extraordinary yet subtle and self-effacing beauty, rises effortlessly and inevitably above the general condition of the surrounding masses! But soon enough the ornate, self-deceiving via self-confusing and underhandedly self-exalting madness dissipates: One finds oneself once again standing upon naught but the blackest, most soul-bereft void. And down, down, down one plummets.

“I had always blamed the void. But the void is not emptiness, nor even void, but only stillness; and the void does not lie, neither flatters, nor derides, nor in any part deceives. The void lacks solid objects and legible, neatly-written answers. When drifting through the void we feel uncertain and insecure. And so we flee again and again into the imaginary salvation of passion’s echo chamber: We again and yet again turn aside from the worldsoul — though it beam forever and always, bright as a million suns, from our own inmost beings outward. And thus do we poor fools continuously harm our own accord with and posture within our most precious possession and one true salvation.

“Yes, Lotte, the void is completely still, and when we likewise hold ourselves utterly still, we perceive that the void is awash in brightly shining, and in all-possible-directions sparkling wings. In the void we find the wings that carry us through this world even as they weave our minds and hearts ever more firmly and awaredly into the joyful silent helpfulness of that deeper, truer one.

“I love thee, Lotte, and no one can replace thee. We shall meet again on Christmas’s Eve. Then I shall depart. Christmas is there to give children joy, to dip them — whilst wrapped safely within the enchantments of the familiar — ever so gently and carefully into the void, wherein they find the wings whereon they shall fly through life — no matter how cold and stormy the nights may become. Adieu, Lotte, we shall soon see one another once more!”

And with these exuberantly careening words he made haste from the home of Lotte and her husband Albert.

It is always a pleasant diversion for me to stroll down the corridor of Die Leiden des Jungen Werthers. With Victor or alone, I walk quickly to the end, where the passageway splits into a short and terrible one and a long, beautiful one. I take always the happier path to see my Werther and his Fräulein von B. Yes! He writes to her, the young woman he’d met in Weimar. He writes to her and soon they begin a world together.

I watch them live well and think of that day when Lee, Vuh, Henry, Justine, Victor and I visited Walheim. And also of that day’s mustaches. You see, upon our return to our scientifically seancing bodies, we discovered that Victor’s father and brothers had protected us from all dangers except themselves: the youngest thought it a lark to draw silly mustaches on all our faces, decorating my cheeks with two giant spirals of black ink; and our other two guards — well, I guess they found it funny too!

Author: Bartleby Willard, except for the selections from Goethe’s Die Leiden des Jungen Werthers and Stifter’s Bergkristall

Translators: Amble Whistletown with Bartleby Willard; except in the selection of Goethe’s Werther: that translation was a collaboration between 1854 translator RD Boylan, his editor Nathan Haskell Dole, Bartleby, and Amble.

Editor: mostly Amble Whistletown

Copyright: Andrew M. Watson (with, of course, no ownership of the original pieces by Goethe and Stifter)

We would like to thank Markus Jais for his corrections of the original German version (Die Offenbarung des Jungen Werthers). Clarifying the grammar and vocabulary choices is a fundamental part of evolving a writing. This English translation (to which we added a few emendations, clarifications, and flourishes) therefore also benefitted from his help with the German original.

[Fixing Frankenstein chapters]

Frankenstein – Ch. 16

Frankenstein – Ch. 16

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

[Continue Reading after you’ve finished Protectors:]

“Cursed, cursed creator! Why did I live? Why, in that instant, did I not extinguish the spark of existence which you had so wantonly bestowed? I know not; despair had not yet taken possession of me; my feelings were those of rage and revenge. I could with pleasure have destroyed the cottage and its inhabitants and have glutted myself with their shrieks and misery.

“When night came I quitted my retreat and wandered in the wood; and now, no longer restrained by the fear of discovery, I gave vent to my anguish in fearful howlings. I was like a wild beast that had broken the toils, destroying the objects that obstructed me and ranging through the wood with a stag-like swiftness. Oh! What a miserable night I passed! The cold stars shone in mockery, and the bare trees waved their branches above me; now and then the sweet voice of a bird burst forth amidst the universal stillness. All, save I, were at rest or in enjoyment; I, like the arch-fiend, bore a hell within me, and finding myself unsympathised with, wished to tear up the trees, spread havoc and destruction around me, and then to have sat down and enjoyed the ruin.

“But this was a luxury of sensation that could not endure; I became fatigued with excess of bodily exertion and sank on the damp grass in the sick impotence of despair. There was none among the myriads of men that existed who would pity or assist me; and should I feel kindness towards my enemies? No; from that moment I declared everlasting war against the species, and more than all, against him who had formed me and sent me forth to this insupportable misery.
“The sun rose; I heard the voices of men and knew that it was impossible to return to my retreat during that day. Accordingly I hid myself in some thick underwood, determining to devote the ensuing hours to reflection on my situation.

“The pleasant sunshine and the pure air of day restored me to some degree of tranquillity; and when I considered what had passed at the cottage, I could not help believing that I had been too hasty in my conclusions. I had certainly acted imprudently. It was apparent that my conversation had interested the father in my behalf, and I was a fool in having exposed my person to the horror of his children. I ought to have familiarised the old De Lacey to me, and by degrees to have discovered myself to the rest of his family, when they should have been prepared for my approach. But I did not believe my errors to be irretrievable, and after much consideration I resolved to return to the cottage, seek the old man, and by my representations win him to my party.

“These thoughts calmed me, and in the afternoon I sank into a profound sleep; but the fever of my blood did not allow me to be visited by peaceful dreams. The horrible scene of the preceding day was for ever acting before my eyes; the females were flying and the enraged Felix tearing me from his father’s feet. I awoke exhausted, and finding that it was already night, I crept forth from my hiding-place, and went in search of food.

“When my hunger was appeased, I directed my steps towards the well-known path that conducted to the cottage. All there was at peace. I crept into my hovel and remained in silent expectation of the accustomed hour when the family arose. That hour passed, the sun mounted high in the heavens, but the cottagers did not appear. I trembled violently, apprehending some dreadful misfortune. The inside of the cottage was dark, and I heard no motion; I cannot describe the agony of this suspense.

“Presently two countrymen passed by, but pausing near the cottage, they entered into conversation, using violent gesticulations; but I did not understand what they said, as they spoke the language of the country, which differed from that of my protectors. Soon after, however, Felix approached with another man; I was surprised, as I knew that he had not quitted the cottage that morning, and waited anxiously to discover from his discourse the meaning of these unusual appearances.

“‘Do you consider,’ said his companion to him, ‘that you will be obliged to pay three months’ rent and to lose the produce of your garden? I do not wish to take any unfair advantage, and I beg therefore that you will take some days to consider of your determination.’

“‘It is utterly useless,’ replied Felix; ‘we can never again inhabit your cottage. The life of my father is in the greatest danger, owing to the dreadful circumstance that I have related. My wife and my sister will never recover from their horror. I entreat you not to reason with me any more. Take possession of your tenement and let me fly from this place.’

“Felix trembled violently as he said this. He and his companion entered the cottage, in which they remained for a few minutes, and then departed. I never saw any of the family of De Lacey more.

“I continued for the remainder of the day in my hovel in a state of utter and stupid despair. My protectors had departed and had broken the only link that held me to the world. For the first time the feelings of revenge and hatred filled my bosom, and I did not strive to control them, but allowing myself to be borne away by the stream, I bent my mind towards injury and death. When I thought of my friends, of the mild voice of De Lacey, the gentle eyes of Agatha, and the exquisite beauty of the Arabian, these thoughts vanished and a gush of tears somewhat soothed me. But again when I reflected that they had spurned and deserted me, anger returned, a rage of anger, and unable to injure anything human, I turned my fury towards inanimate objects. As night advanced, I placed a variety of combustibles around the cottage, and after having destroyed every vestige of cultivation in the garden, I waited with forced impatience until the moon had sunk to commence my operations.

“As the night advanced, a fierce wind arose from the woods and quickly dispersed the clouds that had loitered in the heavens; the blast tore along like a mighty avalanche and produced a kind of insanity in my spirits that burst all bounds of reason and reflection. I lighted the dry branch of a tree and danced with fury around the devoted cottage, my eyes still fixed on the western horizon, the edge of which the moon nearly touched. A part of its orb was at length hid, and I waved my brand; it sank, and with a loud scream I fired the straw, and heath, and bushes, which I had collected. The wind fanned the fire, and the cottage was quickly enveloped by the flames, which clung to it and licked it with their forked and destroying tongues.

“As soon as I was convinced that no assistance could save any part of the habitation, I quitted the scene and sought for refuge in the woods.

“And now, with the world before me, whither should I bend my steps? I resolved to fly far from the scene of my misfortunes; but to me, hated and despised, every country must be equally horrible. At length the thought of you crossed my mind. I learned from your papers that you were my father, my creator; and to whom could I apply with more fitness than to him who had given me life? Among the lessons that Felix had bestowed upon Safie, geography had not been omitted; I had learned from these the relative situations of the different countries of the earth. You had mentioned Geneva as the name of your native town, and towards this place I resolved to proceed.

“But how was I to direct myself? I knew that I must travel in a southwesterly direction to reach my destination, but the sun was my only guide. I did not know the names of the towns that I was to pass through, nor could I ask information from a single human being; but I did not despair. From you only could I hope for succour, although towards you I felt no sentiment but that of hatred. Unfeeling, heartless creator! You had endowed me with perceptions and passions and then cast me abroad an object for the scorn and horror of mankind. But on you only had I any claim for pity and redress, and from you I determined to seek that justice which I vainly attempted to gain from any other being that wore the human form.

“My travels were long and the sufferings I endured intense. It was late in autumn when I quitted the district where I had so long resided. I travelled only at night, fearful of encountering the visage of a human being. Nature decayed around me, and the sun became heatless; rain and snow poured around me; mighty rivers were frozen; the surface of the earth was hard and chill, and bare, and I found no shelter. Oh, earth! How often did I imprecate curses on the cause of my being! The mildness of my nature had fled, and all within me was turned to gall and bitterness. The nearer I approached to your habitation, the more deeply did I feel the spirit of revenge enkindled in my heart. Snow fell, and the waters were hardened, but I rested not. A few incidents now and then directed me, and I possessed a map of the country; but I often wandered wide from my path. The agony of my feelings allowed me no respite; no incident occurred from which my rage and misery could not extract its food; but a circumstance that happened when I arrived on the confines of Switzerland, when the sun had recovered its warmth and the earth again began to look green, confirmed in an especial manner the bitterness and horror of my feelings.

“I generally rested during the day and travelled only when I was secured by night from the view of man. One morning, however, finding that my path lay through a deep wood, I ventured to continue my journey after the sun had risen; the day, which was one of the first of spring, cheered even me by the loveliness of its sunshine and the balminess of the air. I felt emotions of gentleness and pleasure, that had long appeared dead, revive within me. Half surprised by the novelty of these sensations, I allowed myself to be borne away by them, and forgetting my solitude and deformity, dared to be happy. Soft tears again bedewed my cheeks, and I even raised my humid eyes with thankfulness towards the blessed sun, which bestowed such joy upon me.

“I continued to wind among the paths of the wood, until I came to its boundary, which was skirted by a deep and rapid river, into which many of the trees bent their branches, now budding with the fresh spring. Here I paused, not exactly knowing what path to pursue, when I heard the sound of voices, that induced me to conceal myself under the shade of a cypress. I was scarcely hid when a young girl came running towards the spot where I was concealed, laughing, as if she ran from someone in sport. She continued her course along the precipitous sides of the river, when suddenly her foot slipped, and she fell into the rapid stream. I rushed from my hiding-place and with extreme labour, from the force of the current, saved her and dragged her to shore. She was senseless, and I endeavoured by every means in my power to restore animation, when I was suddenly interrupted by the approach of a rustic, who was probably the person from whom she had playfully fled. On seeing me, he darted towards me, and tearing the girl from my arms, hastened towards the deeper parts of the wood. I followed speedily, I hardly knew why; but when the man saw me draw near, he aimed a gun, which he carried, at my body and fired. I sank to the ground, and my injurer, with increased swiftness, escaped into the wood.

“This was then the reward of my benevolence! I had saved a human being from destruction, and as a recompense I now writhed under the miserable pain of a wound which shattered the flesh and bone. The feelings of kindness and gentleness which I had entertained but a few moments before gave place to hellish rage and gnashing of teeth. Inflamed by pain, I vowed eternal hatred and vengeance to all mankind. But the agony of my wound overcame me; my pulses paused, and I fainted.

“For some weeks I led a miserable life in the woods, endeavouring to cure the wound which I had received. The ball had entered my shoulder, and I knew not whether it had remained there or passed through; at any rate I had no means of extracting it. My sufferings were augmented also by the oppressive sense of the injustice and ingratitude of their infliction. My daily vows rose for revenge—a deep and deadly revenge, such as would alone compensate for the outrages and anguish I had endured.

“After some weeks my wound healed, and I continued my journey. The labours I endured were no longer to be alleviated by the bright sun or gentle breezes of spring; all joy was but a mockery which insulted my desolate state and made me feel more painfully that I was not made for the enjoyment of pleasure.

“But my toils now drew near a close, and in two months from this time I reached the environs of Geneva.

“It was evening when I arrived, and I retired to a hiding-place among the fields that surround it to meditate in what manner I should apply to you. I was oppressed by fatigue and hunger and far too unhappy to enjoy the gentle breezes of evening or the prospect of the sun setting behind the stupendous mountains of Jura.

“At this time a slight sleep relieved me from the pain of reflection, which was disturbed by the approach of a beautiful child, who came running into the recess I had chosen, with all the sportiveness of infancy. Suddenly, as I gazed on him, an idea seized me that this little creature was unprejudiced and had lived too short a time to have imbibed a horror of deformity. If, therefore, I could seize him and educate him as my companion and friend, I should not be so desolate in this peopled earth.

“Urged by this impulse, I seized on the boy as he passed and drew him towards me. As soon as he beheld my form, he placed his hands before his eyes and uttered a shrill scream; I drew his hand forcibly from his face and said, ‘Child, what is the meaning of this? I do not intend to hurt you; listen to me.’

“He struggled violently. ‘Let me go,’ he cried; ‘monster! Ugly wretch! You wish to eat me and tear me to pieces. You are an ogre. Let me go, or I will tell my papa.’

“‘Boy, you will never see your father again; you must come with me.’

“‘Hideous monster! Let me go. My papa is a syndic — he is M. Frankenstein—he will punish you. You dare not keep me.’

“‘Frankenstein! you belong then to my enemy — to him towards whom I have sworn eternal revenge; you shall be my first victim.’

[Our Intervention Sparing William begins here.]

[Continue reading after you’ve finished “Sparing William”:]

“The child still struggled and loaded me with epithets which carried despair to my heart; I grasped his throat to silence him, and in a moment he lay dead at my feet.

“I gazed on my victim, and my heart swelled with exultation and hellish triumph; clapping my hands, I exclaimed, ‘I too can create desolation; my enemy is not invulnerable; this death will carry despair to him, and a thousand other miseries shall torment and destroy him.’

“As I fixed my eyes on the child, I saw something glittering on his breast. I took it; it was a portrait of a most lovely woman. In spite of my malignity, it softened and attracted me. For a few moments I gazed with delight on her dark eyes, fringed by deep lashes, and her lovely lips; but presently my rage returned; I remembered that I was for ever deprived of the delights that such beautiful creatures could bestow and that she whose resemblance I contemplated would, in regarding me, have changed that air of divine benignity to one expressive of disgust and affright.

“Can you wonder that such thoughts transported me with rage? I only wonder that at that moment, instead of venting my sensations in exclamations and agony, I did not rush among mankind and perish in the attempt to destroy them.

“While I was overcome by these feelings, I left the spot where I had committed the murder, and seeking a more secluded hiding-place, I entered a barn which had appeared to me to be empty. A woman was sleeping on some straw; she was young, not indeed so beautiful as her whose portrait I held, but of an agreeable aspect and blooming in the loveliness of youth and health. Here, I thought, is one of those whose joy-imparting smiles are bestowed on all but me. And then I bent over her and whispered, ‘Awake, fairest, thy lover is near—he who would give his life but to obtain one look of affection from thine eyes; my beloved, awake!’

“The sleeper stirred; a thrill of terror ran through me. Should she indeed awake, and see me, and curse me, and denounce the murderer? Thus would she assuredly act if her darkened eyes opened and she beheld me. The thought was madness; it stirred the fiend within me—not I, but she, shall suffer; the murder I have committed because I am for ever robbed of all that she could give me, she shall atone. The crime had its source in her; be hers the punishment! Thanks to the lessons of Felix and the sanguinary laws of man, I had learned now to work mischief. I bent over her and placed the portrait securely in one of the folds of her dress. She moved again, and I fled.

“For some days I haunted the spot where these scenes had taken place, sometimes wishing to see you, sometimes resolved to quit the world and its miseries for ever. At length I wandered towards these mountains, and have ranged through their immense recesses, consumed by a burning passion which you alone can gratify. We may not part until you have promised to comply with my requisition. I am alone and miserable; man will not associate with me; but one as deformed and horrible as myself would not deny herself to me. My companion must be of the same species and have the same defects. This being you must create.”

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

Frankenstein – Ch. 15

Frankenstein – Ch. 15

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

“Such was the history of my beloved cottagers. It impressed me deeply. I learned, from the views of social life which it developed, to admire their virtues and to deprecate the vices of mankind.

“As yet I looked upon crime as a distant evil, benevolence and generosity were ever present before me, inciting within me a desire to become an actor in the busy scene where so many admirable qualities were called forth and displayed. But in giving an account of the progress of my intellect, I must not omit a circumstance which occurred in the beginning of the month of August of the same year.

“One night during my accustomed visit to the neighbouring wood where I collected my own food and brought home firing for my protectors, I found on the ground a leathern portmanteau containing several articles of dress and some books. I eagerly seized the prize and returned with it to my hovel. Fortunately the books were written in the language, the elements of which I had acquired at the cottage; they consisted of Paradise Lost, a volume of Plutarch’s Lives, and the Sorrows of Werter. The possession of these treasures gave me extreme delight; I now continually studied and exercised my mind upon these histories, whilst my friends were employed in their ordinary occupations.

“I can hardly describe to you the effect of these books. They produced in me an infinity of new images and feelings, that sometimes raised me to ecstasy, but more frequently sunk me into the lowest dejection. In the Sorrows of Werter, besides the interest of its simple and affecting story, so many opinions are canvassed and so many lights thrown upon what had hitherto been to me obscure subjects that I found in it a never-ending source of speculation and astonishment. The gentle and domestic manners it described, combined with lofty sentiments and feelings, which had for their object something out of self, accorded well with my experience among my protectors and with the wants which were for ever alive in my own bosom. But I thought Werter himself a more divine being than I had ever beheld or imagined; his character contained no pretension, but it sank deep. The disquisitions upon death and suicide were calculated to fill me with wonder. I did not pretend to enter into the merits of the case, yet I inclined towards the opinions of the hero, whose extinction I wept, without precisely understanding it.

“As I read, however, I applied much personally to my own feelings and condition. I found myself similar yet at the same time strangely unlike to the beings concerning whom I read and to whose conversation I was a listener. I sympathised with and partly understood them, but I was unformed in mind; I was dependent on none and related to none. ‘The path of my departure was free,’ and there was none to lament my annihilation. My person was hideous and my stature gigantic. What did this mean? Who was I? What was I? Whence did I come? What was my destination? These questions continually recurred, but I was unable to solve them.

“The volume of Plutarch’s Lives which I possessed contained the histories of the first founders of the ancient republics. This book had a far different effect upon me from the Sorrows of Werter. I learned from Werter’s imaginations despondency and gloom, but Plutarch taught me high thoughts; he elevated me above the wretched sphere of my own reflections, to admire and love the heroes of past ages. Many things I read surpassed my understanding and experience. I had a very confused knowledge of kingdoms, wide extents of country, mighty rivers, and boundless seas. But I was perfectly unacquainted with towns and large assemblages of men. The cottage of my protectors had been the only school in which I had studied human nature, but this book developed new and mightier scenes of action. I read of men concerned in public affairs, governing or massacring their species. I felt the greatest ardour for virtue rise within me, and abhorrence for vice, as far as I understood the signification of those terms, relative as they were, as I applied them, to pleasure and pain alone. Induced by these feelings, I was of course led to admire peaceable lawgivers, Numa, Solon, and Lycurgus, in preference to Romulus and Theseus. The patriarchal lives of my protectors caused these impressions to take a firm hold on my mind; perhaps, if my first introduction to humanity had been made by a young soldier, burning for glory and slaughter, I should have been imbued with different sensations.

“But Paradise Lost excited different and far deeper emotions. I read it, as I had read the other volumes which had fallen into my hands, as a true history. It moved every feeling of wonder and awe that the picture of an omnipotent God warring with his creatures was capable of exciting. I often referred the several situations, as their similarity struck me, to my own. Like Adam, I was apparently united by no link to any other being in existence; but his state was far different from mine in every other respect. He had come forth from the hands of God a perfect creature, happy and prosperous, guarded by the especial care of his Creator; he was allowed to converse with and acquire knowledge from beings of a superior nature, but I was wretched, helpless, and alone. Many times I considered Satan as the fitter emblem of my condition, for often, like him, when I viewed the bliss of my protectors, the bitter gall of envy rose within me.

“Another circumstance strengthened and confirmed these feelings. Soon after my arrival in the hovel I discovered some papers in the pocket of the dress which I had taken from your laboratory. At first I had neglected them, but now that I was able to decipher the characters in which they were written, I began to study them with diligence. It was your journal of the four months that preceded my creation. You minutely described in these papers every step you took in the progress of your work; this history was mingled with accounts of domestic occurrences. You doubtless recollect these papers. Here they are. Everything is related in them which bears reference to my accursed origin; the whole detail of that series of disgusting circumstances which produced it is set in view; the minutest description of my odious and loathsome person is given, in language which painted your own horrors and rendered mine indelible. I sickened as I read. ‘Hateful day when I received life!’ I exclaimed in agony. ‘Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust? God, in pity, made man beautiful and alluring, after his own image; but my form is a filthy type of yours, more horrid even from the very resemblance. Satan had his companions, fellow devils, to admire and encourage him, but I am solitary and abhorred.’

“These were the reflections of my hours of despondency and solitude; but when I contemplated the virtues of the cottagers, their amiable and benevolent dispositions, I persuaded myself that when they should become acquainted with my admiration of their virtues they would compassionate me and overlook my personal deformity. Could they turn from their door one, however monstrous, who solicited their compassion and friendship? I resolved, at least, not to despair, but in every way to fit myself for an interview with them which would decide my fate. I postponed this attempt for some months longer, for the importance attached to its success inspired me with a dread lest I should fail. Besides, I found that my understanding improved so much with every day’s experience that I was unwilling to commence this undertaking until a few more months should have added to my sagacity.

“Several changes, in the meantime, took place in the cottage. The presence of Safie diffused happiness among its inhabitants, and I also found that a greater degree of plenty reigned there. Felix and Agatha spent more time in amusement and conversation, and were assisted in their labours by servants. They did not appear rich, but they were contented and happy; their feelings were serene and peaceful, while mine became every day more tumultuous. Increase of knowledge only discovered to me more clearly what a wretched outcast I was. I cherished hope, it is true, but it vanished when I beheld my person reflected in water or my shadow in the moonshine, even as that frail image and that inconstant shade.

“I endeavoured to crush these fears and to fortify myself for the trial which in a few months I resolved to undergo; and sometimes I allowed my thoughts, unchecked by reason, to ramble in the fields of Paradise, and dared to fancy amiable and lovely creatures sympathising with my feelings and cheering my gloom; their angelic countenances breathed smiles of consolation. But it was all a dream; no Eve soothed my sorrows nor shared my thoughts; I was alone. I remembered Adam’s supplication to his Creator. But where was mine? He had abandoned me, and in the bitterness of my heart I cursed him.

“Autumn passed thus. I saw, with surprise and grief, the leaves decay and fall, and nature again assume the barren and bleak appearance it had worn when I first beheld the woods and the lovely moon. Yet I did not heed the bleakness of the weather; I was better fitted by my conformation for the endurance of cold than heat. But my chief delights were the sight of the flowers, the birds, and all the gay apparel of summer; when those deserted me, I turned with more attention towards the cottagers. Their happiness was not decreased by the absence of summer. They loved and sympathised with one another; and their joys, depending on each other, were not interrupted by the casualties that took place around them. The more I saw of them, the greater became my desire to claim their protection and kindness; my heart yearned to be known and loved by these amiable creatures; to see their sweet looks directed towards me with affection was the utmost limit of my ambition. I dared not think that they would turn them from me with disdain and horror. The poor that stopped at their door were never driven away. I asked, it is true, for greater treasures than a little food or rest: I required kindness and sympathy; but I did not believe myself utterly unworthy of it.

“The winter advanced, and an entire revolution of the seasons had taken place since I awoke into life. My attention at this time was solely directed towards my plan of introducing myself into the cottage of my protectors. I revolved many projects, but that on which I finally fixed was to enter the dwelling when the blind old man should be alone. I had sagacity enough to discover that the unnatural hideousness of my person was the chief object of horror with those who had formerly beheld me. My voice, although harsh, had nothing terrible in it; I thought, therefore, that if in the absence of his children I could gain the good will and mediation of the old De Lacey, I might by his means be tolerated by my younger protectors.

“One day, when the sun shone on the red leaves that strewed the ground and diffused cheerfulness, although it denied warmth, Safie, Agatha, and Felix departed on a long country walk, and the old man, at his own desire, was left alone in the cottage. When his children had departed, he took up his guitar and played several mournful but sweet airs, more sweet and mournful than I had ever heard him play before. At first his countenance was illuminated with pleasure, but as he continued, thoughtfulness and sadness succeeded; at length, laying aside the instrument, he sat absorbed in reflection.

“My heart beat quick; this was the hour and moment of trial, which would decide my hopes or realise my fears. The servants were gone to a neighbouring fair. All was silent in and around the cottage; it was an excellent opportunity; yet, when I proceeded to execute my plan, my limbs failed me and I sank to the ground. Again I rose, and exerting all the firmness of which I was master, removed the planks which I had placed before my hovel to conceal my retreat. The fresh air revived me, and with renewed determination I approached the door of their cottage.

“I knocked. ‘Who is there?’ said the old man. ‘Come in.’

“I entered. ‘Pardon this intrusion,’ said I; ‘I am a traveller in want of a little rest; you would greatly oblige me if you would allow me to remain a few minutes before the fire.’
“‘Enter,’ said De Lacey, ‘and I will try in what manner I can to relieve your wants; but, unfortunately, my children are from home, and as I am blind, I am afraid I shall find it difficult to procure food for you.’

“‘Do not trouble yourself, my kind host; I have food; it is warmth and rest only that I need.’
“I sat down, and a silence ensued. I knew that every minute was precious to me, yet I remained irresolute in what manner to commence the interview, when the old man addressed me.
‘By your language, stranger, I suppose you are my countryman; are you French?’

“‘No; but I was educated by a French family and understand that language only. I am now going to claim the protection of some friends, whom I sincerely love, and of whose favour I have some hopes.’

“‘Are they Germans?’

“‘No, they are French. But let us change the subject. I am an unfortunate and deserted creature, I look around and I have no relation or friend upon earth. These amiable people to whom I go have never seen me and know little of me. I am full of fears, for if I fail there, I am an outcast in the world for ever.’

“‘Do not despair. To be friendless is indeed to be unfortunate, but the hearts of men, when unprejudiced by any obvious self-interest, are full of brotherly love and charity. Rely, therefore, on your hopes; and if these friends are good and amiable, do not despair.’

“‘They are kind—they are the most excellent creatures in the world; but, unfortunately, they are prejudiced against me. I have good dispositions; my life has been hitherto harmless and in some degree beneficial; but a fatal prejudice clouds their eyes, and where they ought to see a feeling and kind friend, they behold only a detestable monster.’

“‘That is indeed unfortunate; but if you are really blameless, cannot you undeceive them?’

“‘I am about to undertake that task; and it is on that account that I feel so many overwhelming terrors. I tenderly love these friends; I have, unknown to them, been for many months in the habits of daily kindness towards them; but they believe that I wish to injure them, and it is that prejudice which I wish to overcome.’

“‘Where do these friends reside?’

“‘Near this spot.’

“The old man paused and then continued, ‘If you will unreservedly confide to me the particulars of your tale, I perhaps may be of use in undeceiving them. I am blind and cannot judge of your countenance, but there is something in your words which persuades me that you are sincere. I am poor and an exile, but it will afford me true pleasure to be in any way serviceable to a human creature.’

“‘Excellent man! I thank you and accept your generous offer. You raise me from the dust by this kindness; and I trust that, by your aid, I shall not be driven from the society and sympathy of your fellow creatures.’

“‘Heaven forbid! Even if you were really criminal, for that can only drive you to desperation, and not instigate you to virtue. I also am unfortunate; I and my family have been condemned, although innocent; judge, therefore, if I do not feel for your misfortunes.’

“‘How can I thank you, my best and only benefactor? From your lips first have I heard the voice of kindness directed towards me; I shall be for ever grateful; and your present humanity assures me of success with those friends whom I am on the point of meeting.’

“‘May I know the names and residence of those friends?’

“I paused. This, I thought, was the moment of decision, which was to rob me of or bestow happiness on me for ever. I struggled vainly for firmness sufficient to answer him, but the effort destroyed all my remaining strength; I sank on the chair and sobbed aloud. At that moment I heard the steps of my younger protectors. I had not a moment to lose, but seizing the hand of the old man, I cried, ‘Now is the time! Save and protect me! You and your family are the friends whom I seek. Do not you desert me in the hour of trial!’

“‘Great God!’ exclaimed the old man. ‘Who are you?’

“At that instant the cottage door was opened, and Felix, Safie, and Agatha entered. Who can describe their horror and consternation on beholding me? Agatha fainted, and Safie, unable to attend to her friend, rushed out of the cottage. Felix darted forward, and with supernatural force tore me from his father, to whose knees I clung, in a transport of fury, he dashed me to the ground and struck me violently with a stick. I could have torn him limb from limb, as the lion rends the antelope. But my heart sank within me as with bitter sickness, and I refrained. I saw him on the point of repeating his blow, when, overcome by pain and anguish, I quitted the cottage, and in the general tumult escaped unperceived to my hovel.”

[Our intervention Protectors begins here.]

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

Frankenstein – Ch. 5

Frankenstein – Ch. 5

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.

It was on a dreary night of November that I beheld the accomplishment of my toils. With an anxiety that almost amounted to agony, I collected the instruments of life around me, that I might infuse a spark of being into the lifeless thing that lay at my feet. It was already one in the morning; the rain pattered dismally against the panes, and my candle was nearly burnt out, when, by the glimmer of the half-extinguished light, I saw the dull yellow eye of the creature open; it breathed hard, and a convulsive motion agitated its limbs.

How can I describe my emotions at this catastrophe, or how delineate the wretch whom with such infinite pains and care I had endeavoured to form? His limbs were in proportion, and I had selected his features as beautiful. Beautiful! Great God! His yellow skin scarcely covered the work of muscles and arteries beneath; his hair was of a lustrous black, and flowing; his teeth of a pearly whiteness; but these luxuriances only formed a more horrid contrast with his watery eyes, that seemed almost of the same colour as the dun-white sockets in which they were set, his shrivelled complexion and straight black lips.

The different accidents of life are not so changeable as the feelings of human nature. I had worked hard for nearly two years, for the sole purpose of infusing life into an inanimate body. For this I had deprived myself of rest and health. I had desired it with an ardour that far exceeded moderation; but now that I had finished, the beauty of the dream vanished, and breathless horror and disgust filled my heart. Unable to endure the aspect of the being I had created, I rushed out of the room and continued a long time traversing my bed-chamber, unable to compose my mind to sleep. At length lassitude succeeded to the tumult I had before endured, and I threw myself on the bed in my clothes, endeavouring to seek a few moments of forgetfulness. But it was in vain; I slept, indeed, but I was disturbed by the wildest dreams. I thought I saw Elizabeth, in the bloom of health, walking in the streets of Ingolstadt. Delighted and surprised, I embraced her, but as I imprinted the first kiss on her lips, they became livid with the hue of death; her features appeared to change, and I thought that I held the corpse of my dead mother in my arms; a shroud enveloped her form, and I saw the grave-worms crawling in the folds of the flannel. I started from my sleep with horror; a cold dew covered my forehead, my teeth chattered, and every limb became convulsed; when, by the dim and yellow light of the moon, as it forced its way through the window shutters, I beheld the wretch—the miserable monster whom I had created. He held up the curtain of the bed; and his eyes, if eyes they may be called, were fixed on me. His jaws opened, and he muttered some inarticulate sounds, while a grin wrinkled his cheeks. He might have spoken, but I did not hear; one hand was stretched out, seemingly to detain me, but I escaped and rushed downstairs. I took refuge in the courtyard belonging to the house which I inhabited, where I remained during the rest of the night, walking up and down in the greatest agitation, listening attentively, catching and fearing each sound as if it were to announce the approach of the demoniacal corpse to which I had so miserably given life.

Oh! No mortal could support the horror of that countenance. A mummy again endued with animation could not be so hideous as that wretch. I had gazed on him while unfinished; he was ugly then, but when those muscles and joints were rendered capable of motion, it became a thing such as even Dante could not have conceived.

[Our intervention Don’t Abandon Me begins here.]

[Continue Reading after having finished “Don’t Abandon Me”:]

I passed the night wretchedly. Sometimes my pulse beat so quickly and hardly that I felt the palpitation of every artery; at others, I nearly sank to the ground through languor and extreme weakness. Mingled with this horror, I felt the bitterness of disappointment; dreams that had been my food and pleasant rest for so long a space were now become a hell to me; and the change was so rapid, the overthrow so complete!

Morning, dismal and wet, at length dawned and discovered to my sleepless and aching eyes the church of Ingolstadt, its white steeple and clock, which indicated the sixth hour. The porter opened the gates of the court, which had that night been my asylum, and I issued into the streets, pacing them with quick steps, as if I sought to avoid the wretch whom I feared every turning of the street would present to my view. I did not dare return to the apartment which I inhabited, but felt impelled to hurry on, although drenched by the rain which poured from a black and comfortless sky.

I continued walking in this manner for some time, endeavouring by bodily exercise to ease the load that weighed upon my mind. I traversed the streets without any clear conception of where I was or what I was doing. My heart palpitated in the sickness of fear, and I hurried on with irregular steps, not daring to look about me:

Like one who, on a lonely road,
Doth walk in fear and dread,
And, having once turned round, walks on,
And turns no more his head;
Because he knows a frightful fiend
Doth close behind him tread.

[Coleridge’s “Ancient Mariner.”]

Continuing thus, I came at length opposite to the inn at which the various diligences and carriages usually stopped. Here I paused, I knew not why; but I remained some minutes with my eyes fixed on a coach that was coming towards me from the other end of the street. As it drew nearer I observed that it was the Swiss diligence; it stopped just where I was standing, and on the door being opened, I perceived Henry Clerval, who, on seeing me, instantly sprung out. “My dear Frankenstein,” exclaimed he, “how glad I am to see you! How fortunate that you should be here at the very moment of my alighting!”

Nothing could equal my delight on seeing Clerval; his presence brought back to my thoughts my father, Elizabeth, and all those scenes of home so dear to my recollection. I grasped his hand, and in a moment forgot my horror and misfortune; I felt suddenly, and for the first time during many months, calm and serene joy. I welcomed my friend, therefore, in the most cordial manner, and we walked towards my college. Clerval continued talking for some time about our mutual friends and his own good fortune in being permitted to come to Ingolstadt. “You may easily believe,” said he, “how great was the difficulty to persuade my father that all necessary knowledge was not comprised in the noble art of book-keeping; and, indeed, I believe I left him incredulous to the last, for his constant answer to my unwearied entreaties was the same as that of the Dutch schoolmaster in The Vicar of Wakefield: ‘I have ten thousand florins a year without Greek, I eat heartily without Greek.’ But his affection for me at length overcame his dislike of learning, and he has permitted me to undertake a voyage of discovery to the land of knowledge.”

“It gives me the greatest delight to see you; but tell me how you left my father, brothers, and Elizabeth.”

“Very well, and very happy, only a little uneasy that they hear from you so seldom. By the by, I mean to lecture you a little upon their account myself. But, my dear Frankenstein,” continued he, stopping short and gazing full in my face, “I did not before remark how very ill you appear; so thin and pale; you look as if you had been watching for several nights.”
“You have guessed right; I have lately been so deeply engaged in one occupation that I have not allowed myself sufficient rest, as you see; but I hope, I sincerely hope, that all these employments are now at an end and that I am at length free.”

I trembled excessively; I could not endure to think of, and far less to allude to, the occurrences of the preceding night. I walked with a quick pace, and we soon arrived at my college. I then reflected, and the thought made me shiver, that the creature whom I had left in my apartment might still be there, alive and walking about. I dreaded to behold this monster, but I feared still more that Henry should see him. Entreating him, therefore, to remain a few minutes at the bottom of the stairs, I darted up towards my own room. My hand was already on the lock of the door before I recollected myself. I then paused, and a cold shivering came over me. I threw the door forcibly open, as children are accustomed to do when they expect a spectre to stand in waiting for them on the other side; but nothing appeared. I stepped fearfully in: the apartment was empty, and my bedroom was also freed from its hideous guest. I could hardly believe that so great a good fortune could have befallen me, but when I became assured that my enemy had indeed fled, I clapped my hands for joy and ran down to Clerval.

We ascended into my room, and the servant presently brought breakfast; but I was unable to contain myself. It was not joy only that possessed me; I felt my flesh tingle with excess of sensitiveness, and my pulse beat rapidly. I was unable to remain for a single instant in the same place; I jumped over the chairs, clapped my hands, and laughed aloud. Clerval at first attributed my unusual spirits to joy on his arrival, but when he observed me more attentively, he saw a wildness in my eyes for which he could not account, and my loud, unrestrained, heartless laughter frightened and astonished him.

“My dear Victor,” cried he, “what, for God’s sake, is the matter? Do not laugh in that manner. How ill you are! What is the cause of all this?”

“Do not ask me,” cried I, putting my hands before my eyes, for I thought I saw the dreaded spectre glide into the room; “he can tell. Oh, save me! Save me!” I imagined that the monster seized me; I struggled furiously and fell down in a fit.

Poor Clerval! What must have been his feelings? A meeting, which he anticipated with such joy, so strangely turned to bitterness. But I was not the witness of his grief, for I was lifeless and did not recover my senses for a long, long time.

This was the commencement of a nervous fever which confined me for several months. During all that time Henry was my only nurse. I afterwards learned that, knowing my father’s advanced age and unfitness for so long a journey, and how wretched my sickness would make Elizabeth, he spared them this grief by concealing the extent of my disorder. He knew that I could not have a more kind and attentive nurse than himself; and, firm in the hope he felt of my recovery, he did not doubt that, instead of doing harm, he performed the kindest action that he could towards them.

But I was in reality very ill, and surely nothing but the unbounded and unremitting attentions of my friend could have restored me to life. The form of the monster on whom I had bestowed existence was for ever before my eyes, and I raved incessantly concerning him. Doubtless my words surprised Henry; he at first believed them to be the wanderings of my disturbed imagination, but the pertinacity with which I continually recurred to the same subject persuaded him that my disorder indeed owed its origin to some uncommon and terrible event.
By very slow degrees, and with frequent relapses that alarmed and grieved my friend, I recovered. I remember the first time I became capable of observing outward objects with any kind of pleasure, I perceived that the fallen leaves had disappeared and that the young buds were shooting forth from the trees that shaded my window. It was a divine spring, and the season contributed greatly to my convalescence. I felt also sentiments of joy and affection revive in my bosom; my gloom disappeared, and in a short time I became as cheerful as before I was attacked by the fatal passion.

“Dearest Clerval,” exclaimed I, “how kind, how very good you are to me. This whole winter, instead of being spent in study, as you promised yourself, has been consumed in my sick room. How shall I ever repay you? I feel the greatest remorse for the disappointment of which I have been the occasion, but you will forgive me.”

“You will repay me entirely if you do not discompose yourself, but get well as fast as you can; and since you appear in such good spirits, I may speak to you on one subject, may I not?”
I trembled. One subject! What could it be? Could he allude to an object on whom I dared not even think?

“Compose yourself,” said Clerval, who observed my change of colour, “I will not mention it if it agitates you; but your father and cousin would be very happy if they received a letter from you in your own handwriting. They hardly know how ill you have been and are uneasy at your long silence.”

“Is that all, my dear Henry? How could you suppose that my first thought would not fly towards those dear, dear friends whom I love and who are so deserving of my love?”
“If this is your present temper, my friend, you will perhaps be glad to see a letter that has been lying here some days for you; it is from your cousin, I believe.”

Author: Mary Shelley
We link here to our intervention.
This is part of Fixing Frankenstein.